Something Else
by mamagrimes
Summary: Now that they finally have somewhere safe to live, Rick and Michonne find themselves looking at their close friendship with new eyes. Will they make that first move into 'something else' before the terrible world they live in intercedes?
1. Then

Michonne was tired. The walk home seemed to last forever and it was only half a mile. They had made good progress on the wall today but there was still a lot of work that had to be done. Shouldn't Virginia be cooler than Georgia? It couldn't have gone below 90 in the shade. She wiped her brow and pulled her dreads off of her neck. Some days she thought about cutting them off to get relief.

As she rounded the corner and looked up at the house, she breathed in the smells of baking. Baking! Such small pleasures that made her smile these days. Carol came out onto the porch to greet her. "Hey there. I have a couple of loaves of bread cooling on your counter. Thought you'd be hungry after the day you've had."

Michonne smiled, "You're a lifesaver Carol. Thank you." She climbed the steps and gave a tired pat to Carol's shoulder as her friend made her leave. "Carl and Judy inside?"

"Yup. Judy's been bathed and is down for the night and Carl is in his room reading. See you in the morning."

Michonne waved goodnight and made her way into the house. The lights were dimmed and it was silent. She stood in the doorway and took in the pristine living room with its clean area rugs and polished hardwood floors. Looking beyond, she gazed at the spacious kitchen with its polished countertops and gleaming appliances. It was surreal. Just a month ago, they were eating dog meat and praying for rain to drink. Now they were living the high life.

"This has to be real. This has to be it." Michonne said this daily almost as a mantra while she struggled with accepting and embracing her new life. It was almost too much. Too many people surrounding them. Too many luxuries. Too many good things.

When would it all go away? Was it just a matter of time?

Michonne shook her head and willed her negative thoughts away. She made her way up the stairs with her eye on the prize. A long, hot shower to wash away the grime and sweat of a hard day's work. She smiled. Would she ever get used to this new life?

Twenty minutes later, Michonne stood in her room in her bath towel trying to decide what to do. The shower had invigorated her and she wasn't sleepy but it was too late to dress again. She looked through her drawers and grabbed a pair of sleep shorts and a tank top so that she could be comfortable in the heat. It was cooler downstairs so she grabbed her book and made her way to the living room. There was a comfy chair with her name on it.

As she headed her way towards her favorite chair, something on the coffee table caught her eye. It was a piece of paper on top of a large book. Curious, she picked up the paper and read a note written in Carl's scrawl:

 _Found this book while checking out one of the empty houses and thought you might like it. Good night!- Carl_

Michonne smiled at the note and then looked down at the book. It was an enormous tome: World History of Art. Michonne dropped into her chair and picked up the book with reverent hands, her smile shaky with emotion. She gently leafed through the pages filled with illustrations of masterpieces. Colors, images, faces and scenery all ran before her eyes as they filled with tears. It was overwhelming. Carl's thoughtfulness. His memory of her love for art. Her memories of galleries, beauty on canvas, endless possibilities in a world that no longer existed.

She wasn't sure how much time passed as she sat curled in her chair staring at the book cradled on her lap. The pages were long since blurred over as tears ran silently down her face. She closed her eyes and remembered finger painting with Andre, his non-stop chatter filling the room as he told her what animal he was drawing and how it was going to be the bestest horse ever. It was going to be a magical purple horse who could fly and fight dragons..."

"Hey."

The quiet greeting broke Michonne out of her past and she opened her eyes to find Rick sitting on the corner of the couch closest to her, his eyes filled with concern. He ducked his head to get a closer look at her eyes. "You okay?"

Michonne was silent as she took in his damp curls and clean t-shirt and jeans. He must have come home early from working on the walls and showered without her even hearing him. _Where did I go? How could I not hear him?_ Shaking her head and returning to the present, Michonne gave a quick swipe to her eyes and sat up straight in the chair.

"I'm fine. Just really tired, that's all. " She took a fortifying breath and looked over at Rick with a small smile of reassurance. _Be strong for him. Don't be a burden._ "You came home early. Walls all done?"

Rick stared at her for a long minute. "Good enough for the night. Everyone was tired with the heat and all so we called it. We'll get started again tomorrow."

"Good. Good. Sounds like a plan." Michonne put the book back on the table and made to rise from the chair but Rick's hand stayed her.

"Hey. Sit down." Rick put slight pressure on her arm to settle her back into her chair. Here we go, Michonne thought. Officer Grimes getting ready to interrogate. He was always so in tune with her moods and expressions, especially since they reunited after the prison. She felt like she had no shields around him. That he could practically hear her thoughts. For someone who'd been on her own for so long, it was unnerving at times to have a friend who knew her so well.

"What's up?" Play it casual and maybe he'll drop it. Rick leaned forward and put his elbows on his knees so that his face was close to hers.

"Why were you crying when I came in? Did something happen?" She couldn't look into his eyes because if she did, she'd see the caring and she'd lose it completely. Rick had enough stress on his shoulders. He didn't need to add hers to the pile.

She stared silently at her tightly clasped hands and felt her weariness. She was tired of the fight. Tired of keeping it together for the good of the group. Tired of trying to make sense of a world gone to hell.

"Michonne?" Rick's raspy voice broke through her pity party and she stared as his hand covered her clasped ones. She looked up to see that Rick was now crouched in front of her chair, his blue eyes squinting at her. "Talk to me. Please."

"It's late Rick and I..."

"I don't care what time it is. I care that I found you sitting in the dark hugging a book and crying. I care that you're hurting and _I want you to talk to me_."

Rick's gruff demand made her squeeze his hand in gratitude. _Here was family. Acceptance. She wasn't alone._

She smiled at him. "You remember that saying, 'Be careful what you ask for...'

"'You just might get it.' Yeah, I'll take my chances. _Talk_."

While she debated the words in her head, she looked at her friend. The man who saved her and took her in. The man who gave her a place in his family and who crept his way into her heart, along with his children. She trusted him with her life. She could trust him with this.

She sat up in the chair and motioned for him to get back on the couch. After he obliged, she took a deep breath and gave him Carl's note.

"Carl wrote me a note and left me a gift tonight." She watched as Rick read the note and look over at the book on the table. His brows drew together as he tried to put the pieces together.

"The book upset you? I'm sure Carl didn't mean..."

"No, no. Carl was sweet to think of me. The book was lovely and I appreciate it. I truly do. It..." She took a deep breath, "It brought back a lot of memories. Wonderful, beautiful memories. Things I haven't thought about in a long, long time. And...I...I think they were just _too much_. They got to me. That's all."

Rick stared at her for several moments, gauging her sincerity and emotional state. He nodded, "Yeah, memories can do that. Reminders of happier days and reminders of what we've lost." He gestured toward the book, "No more museums and art galleries unless we luck across them on a run." He looked back at her, his eyes steady and seeing everything. Leaning forward with his arms on his knees, he tilted his head toward her. "You wanna tell me how a book of paintings made the strongest woman I've ever known cry?"

Michonne smiled. Once a cop, always a cop. Nothing got past him, did it? She looked over at his dear, dear face conveying nothing but concern for her. _She could do this_.

"I collected art...before...everything. I loved it and it was a huge part of my life and..." Deep breath. "my son's life." She looked over at Rick to catch his reaction. His eyes were steady and he wore an understanding smile. _He knew_. Her eyes must have conveyed the question because he answered, his voice soft in the darkened room.

"I saw how you were with Carl. Your easy way with him. While I wasn't certain you were a mother, I knew you had cared for children before. You were a natural. And, then, when we were reunited with Judith, I saw your expression and just had it in my mind that you had a child. I figured when the time was right you'd tell me. I figured you kept a lot private and respected that. In the meantime, though, I wanted you to know that I trusted you with mine. That I knew you'd care for them and protect them if I weren't here. That you would love them."

Rick's gentle words made Michonne's eyes well up again. This man is killing me with kindness. How much more can I take? She felt her hands enveloped in his warm, callused ones and looked up. His face was inches from hers as he whispered.

"When I thought I would never see Carl again, I thought my life was over. _Done_. I didn't want to see another day if he wasn't in it. But then I found him and eventually I had Judith too. Losing Lori was..." He took a deep breath, his eyes looking off into the distance at dark memories, "tough. I'll never forget her or that day but having Carl and Judith was _everything_. I went to an awful place for awhile but knowing they needed me, knowing I had children to care for and to love...well that pulled me out."

He gazed into her teary eyes and squeezed her hands. "I'm not going to pretend to know or understand what you're feeling and I'm not going to pressure you to tell me what happened to your son. You tell me when you're ready. But I will tell you this. _You have a family here_. You have people who love you and care about you. Don't you forget that for one minute, understood?" He ended his words on a fierce whisper.

Michonne was overwhelmed. Her night had begun with exhaustion and had ended with a feeling of her heart being so full it was close to bursting. Memories of Andre, mourning him, coupled with this emotionally charged conversation with Rick was just about all she could take without breaking down again. Never one to bare her soul, she knew a retreat was in order. With a tremulous smile, she looked over at her friend.

"Thank you Rick. Thank you for that. It means so much. Thank you for listening and I promise..." Her voice got stronger here as her determination built, "I promise that I will tell you about Andre when I'm ready. Okay?"

Rick smiled, "Andre, huh?" Michonne smiled and nodded back. "Well, that's a deal I'll make sure to take you up on. I can't wait to hear about Andre." Rick stood up and pulled Michonne with him. "It's late and we've got another long day tomorrow. We should turn in." Rick gestured Michonne to walk up the stairs ahead of him.

When they reached Michonne's room, she turned. Rick was close enough so she could whisper, "Thanks again. For...everything." Rick smiled softly and nodded.

Without thinking, Michonne wrapped her arms around Rick's shoulders and pulled him in for a hug. Their friendship wasn't a demonstrative one but it felt right after the evening she'd had. She felt him stiffen in surprise for a moment and then his arms wrapped around her tightly as she felt his chin rest on the top of her head. It's amazing what the closeness of another human being can do. Michonne felt herself getting stronger with each moment she was held in Rick's arms. It was as if her batteries were recharging and she felt warm all over. She also felt Rick trembling slightly and wondered at that. She pulled away to look up at him in time to see his eyes widen in surprise as if he were caught off guard. He swallowed visibly, stared at her for a long moment and then awkwardly took a step back.

"Well, um...good night then. See you in the morning." His gravelly whisper stayed with her as he backed away and disappeared down the dark hallway to the room he shared with his children.

Michonne tilted her head in wonder as she stared down the dark hallway. _What just happened?_


	2. Now

**Chapter 2: Now**

"You gonna at least buy it dinner first?" The gravelly Texas twang interrupted Rick's musings as he crouched in the shade near the wall construction. He squinted up at Abe who was standing over him holding onto lumber.

"What?"

"The way you were rubbin' on that hammer handle, I thought it only right to buy it some dinner first." Abe shook his head and chuckled as Rick just stared at him blankly. "When you're done contemplating life and tools, I'd appreciate a hand with the next panel. Right over there." He pointed, gave Rick one more head shake and then sauntered off with the lumber slung over his shoulder.

Rick stood up and took a deep breath. He had to get his shit together and fast. There was work to be done and he had no time to be thinking about... _Jesus_...what _was_ that last night? He'd played it over in his mind again and again as he tossed restlessly in bed and still couldn't make sense of it.

He'd come home early from the wall, showered and looked into Michonne's room as her door was open. Finding the room empty, he made his way downstairs where he found her curled up on the chair, holding a book to her chest and crying softly. The sight had hit him square in the chest and made him lose his breath. He'd never seen her vulnerable. She was always strong and together. Even when they faced hell and death was breathing down their necks, _she kept it together_.

He'd quickly made his way to the corner of the couch closest to her and reached out with a gentle touch so as not to startle her. She opened her eyes and the tears just about did him in. In a split second, he remembered the countless times she supported him, gave him space to be dark and welcomed him back without question. _I have to be there for her now. I have to be the strong one._

So he was. He listened to her talk about her son. He saw the loss in her eyes before she shuttered them. He felt her pain in his chest and his gut as if they were talking about his own son. In those quiet moments, he felt as connected to her as he'd ever felt to another person. He wanted to absorb her hurt, take it off of her shoulders. If only it were as easy as clearing a path of walkers or putting up a wall. But it wasn't and he fumbled through it as best he could.

He could see his friend come back to her normal self as they had neared her door and he felt better.

Then she hugged him.

In the year since they'd met, Michonne had become his closest friend. He trusted her with his kids and with his own life. She'd proven time and time again to be his equal in most ways and, he admitted, his better in others. He counted his damn blessings every day she was in his life and when she asked to travel those last 100 miles to Alexandria, he couldn't say yes fast enough. He'd do just about anything for her as _she was family_.

But their friendship wasn't physical. A couple light touches and that was it. He didn't think it was a conscious decision on either of their parts. It's just how it was. What she didn't give him, she gave his kids. She showered them with affection , smiles and laughter at every opportunity. It was as if she reserved all of her light for them and didn't have any to spare. Rick had always been fine with that because it kept his kids cared for and it kept his friendship with Michonne in a box that made sense.

Last night threw him. Her softness. Her tears. Their whispered conversation. And then the hug. He had felt every single inch of her pressed up against him as, instinctually, he pulled her in close. They fit. _God, they fit_. His chin rested on the top of her head as it was meant to. His body fit with hers and _it felt so damn good._

What did that mean? _Should_ it mean something? Was it just two friends finding comfort in a quiet moment? Did they just keep on keeping on? Why did it feel like he had to get the answers or he would screw everything up?

"Dad!"

Rick shook his head and came out of his reverie as Carl came running up.

"Can I help with the wall today? I finished my homework and Carol's with Judy."

Rick smiled at his son. Back to reality. There would be time to figure this out later. _He'd make the time_. Rick put his hand on Carl's shoulder.

"You bet. We need all the men we can get today. C'mon. Abe's waiting for us." He jogged with Carl over to the work site that was humming with activity. A full day of manual labor would be a great distraction and help him get his head on straight. He grabbed a long piece of lumber and walked over to where the braces were being set up. "Carl, help me lift this into that slot up there..."

Three hours later, dripping sweat and grimy, Rick walked over to the makeshift table to grab some lunch with Carl and the other workers. He looked back at the wall in satisfaction. They were close to fortifying the one vulnerable spot the town had and would move onto moving the outside braces over to the interior to prevent anyone from using them to get into the town uninvited. _They were making progress_. One day at a time.

As Rick neared the lunch area, he heard familiar laughter and looked over to see Michonne sitting with Rosita and Maggie, all three of them as grimy as he was. They must have been working on the trenches for the walker traps they were planning on putting out. He couldn't take his eyes off of her bright smile as she shook her head at whatever Rosita was saying. It was both wonderful and strange to see such a normal moment. They'd earned it. The meal sharing. The levity. They'd earned every bit of it and they'd get many more of these moments if he had anything to say about it.

Rick sat down directly across from Michonne. "Hey." If he was staring at her face to try to catch her reaction, he'd never admit it. When Michonne looked up, she gave him a friendly smile and shook her head at his hands.

"Oh no, my friend. You don't get to sit down until those hands are washed. You too Carl. Pump is over there. Wash first, then sit and eat. We are civilized folk around here."

Rick breathed a sigh of relief. Okay, that was normal. No awkwardness. No avoidance. He nodded and waved Carl over to follow him to wash. When he was done, he turned back to the table and saw that Abe and Spence had taken the seats he and Carl had. He felt a surge of annoyance as he watched them interact with the women. _With Michonne_. His brows lowered as he watched her smile and tilt her head to the side in that way of hers. His jaw clenching, he walked over to the food line just in time to watch Carl take his food and sit under the tree next to Enid. Great, even my kid is abandoning me.

Sitting at an empty table, Rick ate food that had looked appealing a few minutes ago but now tasted like day old sawdust. He ate for sustenance and not enjoyment as he listened to the laughter at the table next to him. After his last bite, he glanced over at Michonne as she cleared her space and walked away with Rosita, not once looking over at him. _Why would she? Because of a hug? Christ, Grimes, Pull it together. What is wrong with you_?

Rick threw his garbage away and cleared his mind of confusing, crazy thoughts. There was work to do.


	3. Friends

"Helloooo….earth to the mothership…come in….Hey Michonne…you okay?"

Michonne looked up to see Rosita leaning on the shovel handle and observing her with a small smile. She stopped shoveling and wiped her hand across her sweaty brow.

"Sorry, yeah, I'm fine. Just was day dreaming, that's all."

"Anything interesting?"

"What?"

"Your _day dream_. Anything interesting? I need entertainment during manual labor. Help a sister out, will ya?"

If only you knew. Michonne shook her head and smiled. "Trust me, it would put you to sleep." Or stun you into silence if you knew I was thinking about our fearless leader. First the hug, now day dreaming about him. What would come next? Following him around like a groupie?

"Sure, whatever. Keep it to yourself. I'll just go back to trying to remember old Coldplay lyrics while I dig ditches."

Michonne laughed at Rosita's comment and appreciated the distraction. All morning she had replayed the night's events in her head and each time wound up more confused. She played it cool with Rick at lunchtime but it took everything she had not to move over and sit with him when he ended up alone.

She knew he had a lot on his mind as they all settled into Alexandria. He was trying to work with Deanna and make his peace with Morgan, all while trying to shore up defenses for a town that had to catch up to the hell they were all living in.

The last thing Rick needed was her asking him about _his feelings_ , especially since she wasn't even sure about her own. Rick was her friend. She loved him dearly and would do anything for him. _Anything_. She'd give her life for him and for his children. That she was sure of. But last night…there was something else there. An awareness…or something….

Shaking her head in frustration she went back to her shovel, determined to bury her wayward thoughts before they got her in trouble.

"So, what song is in your head now? Wanna do a duet?" she asked Rosita with a laugh.

Rick let himself in the house with a sigh of relief. _They had done it_. They had finished the walls and the town was secure. _For now_ , he corrected himself. The residents all had to be trained on weapons next because it was only a matter of time before a threat came to their doors.

He stopped as he picked up off key singing in the kitchen followed by Carl's laughter and Michonne's groan.

"No, no, no, you gotta go lower on that last note. Like this…

 _When you try your best but you don't succe-eeed"_

Michonne's smooth alto filled the house and Rick stopped to enjoy it. He smiled as Carl joined her for the next line:

"When you get what you want by not what you ne-eeed" They definitely had to work on their harmonizing but he could hear the smiles in their voices along with Judith's giggles. He approached the kitchen in time to see Michonne waving a wooden spoon covered in tomato sauce at Carl as they sang together.

"Stuck in reverrrsee…" The high note cracked Michonne and Carl up and they doubled in laughter. Smiling, Rick entered the kitchen and placed his cap on the counter.

"Am I too late for the concert?" Michonne and Carl looked his way, still laughing and Rick felt warmth spread throughout his belly at the sight of their happy faces. _So this is what coming home feels like_ **.**

"I'm trying, emphasize _trying_ to teach this young man the nuances of the epic band Coldplay's music. But I get the feeling he's not fully on board. I might have to just stick with Rosita as my duet partner."

Smiling, Carl nodded, "Yeah, that's probably for the best. Maybe when Judy gets bigger, you can teach her that girly music."

"Girly! I'll show you girly!" Michonne gave Carl a playful nudge with her shoulder as Carl took Judith out of her high chair.

"I'll go change her and wash her up for dinner, okay?"

Rick nodded. "Sounds good. Thanks Carl."

And then he was alone with Michonne for the first time since their midnight hug. Rick shook his head. _Don't give it a name and it won't screw things up_.

Getting his bearings he walked over to where Michonne was stirring the sauce on the stove. "Smells good. I think I've forgotten what spaghetti even looks like let alone taste."

Michonne smiled and looked at him out of the corner of her eye. "If that's your way of trying to sneak a taste, you're just going to have to wait like the rest of us. I run a tight kitchen, Mr. Grimes."

"I bet you do," Rick answered with a laugh as he pulled up a stool at the counter to watch her work. "We finished the wall so this place is now officially secure against walkers."

Michonne nodded as she stirred. "But not against the living." Her soft spoken words echoed in the large kitchen. She knew that they were vulnerable until every single resident was armed and knew what to do in case of an attack. And she knew that weighed heavily on Rick as she looked over at him staring at his clasped hands. She put the spoon down and walked over to the counter.

"Hey."

Rick looked up as Michonne gently covered his hands with one of her own. She was leaning on the other side of the counter so that their faces were level with each other. He wasn't sure if he'd ever get used to them touching now. For most of their friendship, there was no physical contact as he gave her the space she needed. A few weeks ago, they started with a hand brush here, a tap on the shoulder there, just small bits of comfort from one friend to another.

But that hug. That was something else. That was _more_. It was on his mind all day today and it was all he could think about right this moment as she placed her hand innocently on his. What did it mean? Are we family now and we just hug all the time? Or...

"Rick? You okay?" Michonne wasn't sure where Rick went but she wanted him back and present. He looked up at her and she realized as she gazed into his beautiful blue eyes that she was mere inches from his face. Heart pounding, Michonne quickly stood up but kept her hand on his. "Listen, I know you're worried. I am too. These people...They're...I don't know. They're sheltered, _innocent_. They're like kids almost. She squeezed his hands as she whispered fiercely. "But you've trained kids, Rick. Carl, Beth, Noah. They became soldiers. And Carol. When you met her she was afraid of her own shadow. Now look at her. She even scares **me** sometimes." That won her a small chuckle.

Michonne patted his hand and walked back to the stove, businesslike now. "So tomorrow we show them how to get it done. We show them when to be afraid and when not to and we show them how to kill. They'll know what I've known for a long time. Just how lucky we all are to have you as our leader." She looked over at him to find his eyes glued to hers with an intensity she would never get used to if she lived to be 100. _Lord have mercy, those eyes_. She took a calming breath and returned his gaze.

 _She's beautiful_. He always knew that. He wasn't blind and knew from the moment he spotted her at the fence surrounded by walkers that she was beautiful. But, in this moment, he _really saw her_. Not just as his best friend and fellow fighter. But as a woman standing in a kitchen they shared, cooking while once again talking him off the ledge he always found himself on. I don't deserve her but I'm going to do everything I can not to screw things up. _I need her_.

Rick's voice was a gravelly murmur as he responded. "I don't think I'll rest until everyone is caught up. I can't enjoy," he gestured to the pot on the stove, " _spaghetti_ when there are people out there who are going to want what we have and who we're gonna have to fight. I don't think we'll ever be able to let our guard down. Why would we think we could?"

Michonne's heart broke for Rick as she could feel the tension come off of him. She drained the spaghetti and turned the heat off of the sauce. "You know what? Here's what I think. I think that we've had a hellava year. We've fought, we've lost, we've been hungry and thirsty and we've seen and done things we _can't take back_." She walked back to the counter and leaned down again. "But _we're still here_ , Rick. We're alive. We're together. The kids are here. _That all counts_. That's the good. And sometimes, just for little moments of time, _we get to enjoy life_. We deserve to and we need to." Rick gazed at her forever but she forced herself not to back away. She needed to make certain he understood that it was okay to be happy and to feel safe, even if it was for just a little while.

Rick swallowed as he stared into Michonne's big brown eyes. Her words washed over him like a breeze and he felt the fear and tension leave his body as different feelings came through. Love. Strength. Comfort. And...something he couldn't or wouldn't name. Finally, he came to his senses. "Thank you. I hear you and I..." He ran his fingers up and down his face tiredly, "am gonna try really hard to do that. To enjoy and be happy."

Michonne smiled and nodded with satisfaction. "Great. Now go wash your hands and get Carl and Judy. Dinner's served." Rick slowly stood up from the stool, looked at her for a long moment and gave a small smile.

"Yes, M'am. I'm here to please." Michonne pulled her lips in so her mouth wouldn't fall open at those words and his smirk as he walked away. _Did he just flirt with her_? She shook her head. She needed to get out more. She and Rick were spending way too much time together in this house and it was starting to mess with her head.

Things would get back to normal tomorrow. _Wouldn't they?_


	4. Battle

**Thank you so much for the positive feedback and support! As a brand new writer, it's everything to me. I'm having so much fun creating this world for Rick and Michonne and giving them special moments with each other. I'm working on trying to lengthen my chapters a bit and hope you enjoy the extra content. These two characters are just so much fun to spend time with...**

The next few days brought routine and some semblance of normalcy to Rick and Michonne. They woke up early, had a quick breakfast and then went out to train the Alexandria residents on defense as well as worked on walker traps. Since Rick was training the residents on guns and Michonne on hand to hand, they rarely crossed paths during the day and, at night, they either ate with Carol and Sasha or Glenn and Maggie before falling into bed exhausted.

There was no time for more intimate conversations or confidences. No time for soft, comforting touches that served to confuse and complicate things.

And that was perfectly fine with Michonne. That's what she wanted, right? For things to get back to normal? The world was all shot to hell but if there was one thing Michonne could control, it was her friendship with Rick. She wasn't about to screw it up now that they've finally found a place they could call home. They were good for each other, balanced each other, kept each other's monsters at bay. That was more important now than ever as Rick and their group sought to strengthen this town and everyone living in it.

Michonne closed her eyes and took a deep, calming breath. _Just do your part. Keep everyone safe. Help Rick. Protect Carl and Judith._ It was her daily mantra and helped to focus her on the day. Feeling better, Michonne strapped on her sword and walked to the park area where she, Abraham and Spencer were going to work with some of the residents on moving targets. She and Abraham promoted Spencer to trainer as he showed an aptitude for the melee weapons and they thought it would be good to elevate him and build a bridge with the residents in the process.

"Hey, Chief. It's a fine day for stabbin', ain't it?" Michonne rolled her eyes at Abe's insistence to defer to her as his boss. He gave her that title during their first training session, stating that if Rick listened to her, why shouldn't he?

"Indeed it is. Did you set up all the targets?" Michonne had asked that life sized dummies be made out of materials they had handy and that those dummies be weighted in order to make the experience as realistic as possible. They were hung from branches so they could be swung toward the trainees unexpectedly. It wasn't perfect but it was better than nothing.

"All hung and ready to go. " He walked with her the rest of the way to the training field. "We've got 4 of our best this morning. They've been kicking the shit outta these things and I think they're ready to ramp it up a notch."

Michonne smiled, looking forward to the exercise. "Well let's give them a real workout today, shall we?"

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Rick felt a headache coming on as he showed one of his trainees how to load the rifle for the fifth time. If they can't get it now, how are they ever going to do this under pressure? Are they ever going to be able to defend this place? He looked over at Glenn and Rosita as they worked with their groups on cleaning the weapons. Each day that went by was a day closer to the possibility of an attack as those high walls were just giant billboards to others that something valuable was inside. Rick closed his eyes and rubbed his temples and then he heard it.

 _Michonne's laughter_. He knew that laugh like he knew his own because each time he heard it he felt lighter and he felt that maybe, just maybe, there was still good in this world. But right now he didn't feel lighter. He felt resentful. He'd barely seen Michonne these last few days as they trained. Instead, she was spending hours with Abe and Spencer. Hours that she was apparently enjoying from the sound of it. Clenching his jaw, he slammed the chamber shut on the gun he was working on.

"Did I do something wrong, Rick?" the woman he was working with asked. He snapped out of his thoughts as he looked over at the meek, blonde housewife he was training, along with her sons. Jessie. The woman whose husband he killed when he went on a rampage. She and her sons represented everything that was a problem in this town. No experience with the outside, no idea of how bad it was and absolutely no experience with killing walkers. He had his work cut out for him. Rick sighed.

"Nah, you're fine. Let's review it again."

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Michonne stood next to Abraham as they watched Spencer manipulate the dummies to once again 'attack' the trainees. She smiled as she observed them dodging and evading and then using their hands in the chest area to stabilize the dummy before stabbing it in the head with a killing blow. These three men and one woman indeed showed promise and they seemed to actually thrive on the activity, almost as if they'd been asleep and were now awake and ready to fight.

"They're killing the dummies. They're gonna be shreds of burlap and newspaper within the hour if they keep this up," Abe drawled.

"Yeah, I know. We need to challenge them. Bring it up a notch." Michonne looked around and all she saw were picket fences and manicured gardens. She saw a fairytale when they needed a battleground.

"We could take 'em outside."

"What?" Michonne turned to Abe, her head cocked. "Take these four outside of the gates?"

Abe nodded. "It's been quiet but there are always a few of 'em out there. Sasha could cover us in the tower if things get outta hand."

Michonne thought about it, wondered if she should check with Rick but, after a minute or so, nodded her head once with certainty. Rick shouldn't be burdened with every decision. They needed to get past relying on him for everything. She looked up at Abe and smiled.

"Let's do this."

Rick was counting down the minutes until training was done. He knew it was necessary but he just wanted it to be over with already. He wanted this place secure and wanted every single person in his care to be ...

"Rick! Come quick!" The panicked shout from Lisa, one of the residents jerked his head up and over to where she was running toward him. He jogged over to meet her halfway.

"What is it?"

Lisa had to catch her breath but her eyes were wild with fear. "I was...(pant)...walking my dog near the south gate and I heard sounds...I knew those things were near so I peeked out to see and there was a huge bunch of 'em surrounding Michonne and..."

Rick's heart stopped. All he heard was Michonne's name and he was sprinting for the south gate, gun drawn. He shouted for Glenn and Rosita to follow him since he had no idea how many were out there. What was Michonne doing outside the gates? She was supposed to be training. Why was she outside? She knew better. _She's okay. She has to be okay._ Rick made it to the gate and barely stopped before throwing the latch to reach the outside.

All Rick saw were the backs of a half dozen walkers. "Michonne! I'm coming...I'm..." He ran full throttle to the first one and blew it's head off with his gun and then sliced into the second one with his machete. He had to get to Michonne. _Where was she_? She had to be okay. He pivoted on his heal to partially decapitate the third before he saw movement to his left.

 _Michonne_. Thank God. She was staring at him as Abraham swore and took care of the remaining walkers along with Spencer and one of their trainees. _Trainees_. Rick stood for a moment to take in the scene before him. There were at least a dozen lifeless walkers littering the ground surrounded by Michonne's trainees with their weapons drawn and dripping in blood. He quickly put it together as Glenn and Rosita came running up behind him. He marched over to Michonne as his panic transformed into anger.

"You brought them out here to _**train**_? Is this a goddamned game to you? You could've been killed! They could have been killed! They're not ready! You were supposed to stay inside the gates! Not be out here!" Rick was breathing heavy as he stared into Michonne's eyes. Eyes that had started out filled with concern for him were now narrowing with her own anger. She remained quiet as was her way. Well, Rick was having none of that. "What were you thinking? Answer me dammit!"

 _Quiet_. Michonne continued to stare at Rick as he was in her face, bloody machete dripping to the side of him. Her chest heaved with agitation and Rick could feel her breath on his face only two inches from his. His already racing heart picked up speed and he didn't know how to calm it. _She shouldn't be out here. She needs to be safe._

"Okay, show's over folks. Let's all head back inside while the bosses work things out." Abe's drawled command barely resonated with Rick as his eyes, his mind, his body were completely connected with the woman in front of him. He barely registered the crowd leaving until the quiet surrounded the two of them.

Michonne looked at Rick in disbelief and hurt. She couldn't believe he assumed the worst of her and believed that she would put lives at risk for, what did he call it? A game? In the back of her mind, she knew he had been worried about her but he had a piss poor way of showing it.

This man needed a wake-up call.

Michonne stepped away, took a deep breath, looked around to make certain there weren't any remaining walkers and then finally focused on her unruly leader. "Let me clarify a few things for you. If you're done being an _ass_ and would actually care to listen." While she didn't raise her voice, it was stern enough to get his attention. He straightened and nodded. _Oh great. The King gives me permission to speak_. Michonne barely restrained herself from rolling her eyes.

"The training was going better than expected and our group was ready to try the real thing. Abe, Spence and I all talked about it...at length..and we agreed. If you had stopped for one second before coming in here like Attila the Hun, you would have seen Sasha in the tower covering us the whole time." Her voice started to raise as her own words elevated her anger. "If you had stopped for _another second_ , you would have seen that those trainees had just put down all of those walkers."

Michonne walked right up to a silent Rick and started jabbing her finger into his chest as her anger was now full blown. "AND, if you just stopped instead of immediately thinking the worst, you would remember that I do not take risks. I do not put others at risk. I'm not some idiot who has never done this before, Rick. I'm ME. I'm the woman who's been out HERE forever. I'm the woman who knows more about _these things_ ," she gestured angrily at the pile of bodies next to them, "than anyone else," She backed away now as her anger diffused and she looked up at Rick with concern once again.

"Get it together. Whatever you have to do to get it together, just do it. Don't doubt me. Don't doubt what I can do. And _don't ever question me being out here_. You can do a lot but you don't get to do that." With those parting words, Michonne left her silent friend to contemplate life as she made her way home.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

It was after midnight when Michonne quietly let herself into the house. After her confrontation with Rick, she went straight home, took a shower and then spent the evening at Glenn and Maggie's house where she allowed herself to be distracted and comforted by her good friends. Maggie, in particular, made her smile with her fierce defense of Michonne's training tactics and Rick's presumptions. Michonne missed having girlfriends and nights spent around a glass of wine or two. It was nice to capture just a little bit of that feeling for a few hours. She sighed as she clicked the door shut behind her and threw the bolt. She slowly made her way to the stairs, already thinking about how she would handle her next interaction with Rick.

"Hey." Rick's quiet greeting stopped Michonne at the foot of the stairs and she turned to see him sitting in the living room, the lamp turned down low and an open book on his lap. _So much for having time to think about things._ She turned and walked slowly toward his chair.

"Hi. I didn't see you there. Couldn't sleep?" Breathe in, breathe out, girl. Keep it steady and it will be okay. Rick closed the book and stood up, striding over to where she stood. He looked worn out and tired and her cold armor cracked. She just couldn't stay mad at him. It was like staying mad at Carl or Judy. Impossible. _This was family_.

"I couldn't sleep without talking to you first," Rick looked at her, his blue eyes intense in the low light. "I wanted to apologize. For earlier. I screwed up. I...," he took a deep breath, "I went a little crazy and I'm sorry. I'm sorry for doubting you and I'm sorry for ever thinking you didn't have things figured out."

Michonne stared into Rick's eyes as a warmth spread through her. _It's going to be okay. We're going to be okay. We can do this_. She laid her hand on his arm. "I'm sorry too. I could see that you were worried about me and I shouldn't have snapped at you. I'm still trying to get used to people looking out for me and I'm not always the best at showing my appreciation. But I am, you know. I'm thankful for you and it's nice to know you care. Even if you drive me crazy sometimes."

Her levity seemed lost on Rick as he continued to stare at her, his eyes roaming her face as if committing it to memory. "When I thought you were out there...alone...fighting, I..." he swallowed, "All I could think of was getting to you so you wouldn't be alone. I had to get to you before it was too late. I knew it couldn't be too late."

Michonne could tell he was getting upset all over again at the memory. She gripped both his arms with her hands and stood right in front of him. She had to get through somehow. "Rick, listen to me, _please_. I'm still the woman who survived out there, alone, for a good long time. I know how to stay safe. I know when to run and when to fight. Yeah, I might cook a meal once in awhile now and sweep a floor but I'm still _her_. I have my sword and I know what I'm doing. That will never leave me. Understand?"

Rick was quiet for another moment as continued to stare at her, his chest moved rapidly with his breaths. After several long moments, he seemed to snap out of it as he shook his head quickly and stepped away, running his hand through his hair. "I know. I know that. It's just that I'm..I'm having a hard time...here." He gestured around the room. "Living in mansions with electricity and running water and ovens but still having to deal with everything out _there_. It's confusing that's all. I just gotta figure it out."

" _We_ have to figure it out Rick. I get it because I feel it too. I'm not ready to swap recipes and talk about decorating styles when the only thing separating us from hell are thin walls."

"But they're 15' high slabs of solid steel," Rick's mocking repeat of Aaron's recruiting pitch made Michonne chuckle.

"True very true...How could I forget?" She looked at Rick as he finally smiled. "Are we okay? We good?"

Rick took in a long breath and whispered, "Yeah, we're good."

Michonne smiled in relief. It was going to work out. _It had to_. "Well, goodnight then. See you in the morning." She was at the foot of the stairs when Rick's hand stopped her. She turned to see him just a couple of inches away. Her breath caught.

"Look. I'm not one for a lot of words. It's something I'm working on. But you gotta know..." he swallowed and look at the ceiling for guidance and then zeroed back in on her, "you gotta know that you're important to me. You have to stay safe. You, Carl and Judy. Okay? _You have to_." His last words were a ragged whisper.

 _Oh Sweet Lord, keep it together, girl_. Michonne's heart raced as she felt Rick's hand on her arm burn a trail of fire throughout her body. He's your friend. He's family. He's a man who's keeping it together for everyone else. _Help him_. Don't complicate things. Michonne's smile was shaky but she pulled it off. "You're important to me too Rick. We're in this together. I'll stay safe, okay?" _Please let me go. Please_. Michonne's breathing accelerated as crazy thoughts ran through her mind. Possibilities. The future.

"Okay. Okay. Thank you." Rick backed away and gave her the space her equilibrium desperately needed.

"Goodnight Michonne."

"Goodnight Rick."


	5. Distance

**Thank you everyone for your wonderful feedback and support of my story! This chapter is a bit heavier than the others but hang in there. The good stuff is coming!**

Michonne stood on the front porch and watched the sun rise. She loved being the first one awake. Loved the quiet and the peace. _Just her and the birds_. Memories flashed through her mind of her time on the road alone. So many days and weeks of no sounds but her own breathing and nature all around her. Solitude became so ingrained into her very being she still wasn't sure how she ever integrated with people again. She smiled and shook her head. No, she knew how. _Rick_. He took her in, gave her shelter and a family. His trust and his friendship.

Everything.

Michonne was adrift and lost back then. Mourning Andre. Angry. Bitter. Was that only a year ago? Now look where she was. Living the high life in warzone surburbia with people she would never have run across before the world went to hell. Shaking her head with the irony, she started down the steps to begin her rounds when she saw Rick round the corner two houses down. She started in surprise and greeted him. "Hey there! You must have been up before dawn. I didn't even hear you leave."

Rick smiled and raised his hand in greeting as he met her at the bottom of the steps. He shoved his hands in his constable jacked and shifted on his feet. "I couldn't sleep so I figured I'd do something useful and walk the perimeter, check on the walls."

Michonne nodded. "Everything look good? No breaches?"

"We're good," Rick looked her uniform over. "On your way out?" At Michonne's nod, he gestured to the porch stairs. "You've got some time since I just walked the town. Can you sit for a minute? I wanna run something by you."

Michonne nodded and sat, her heart beating just a little bit faster. Things had gotten back to normal since Rick's apology three days ago but that was mostly because they were never alone. If the kids weren't around, Carol, Daryl and the others were. There were routines, long work days and meals with the group and then spending time with Carl and Judith at night. No whispered conversations at the bottom of stairs. No long stares or touches. No...

"Michonne?" Rick's husky drawl interrupted her completely ridiculous musings and she quickly snapped out of it with a shake of her head.

"Sorry, you had something to run by me?" There. Perfectly normal. _No problem_.

Rick rubbed his palms on his jeans and then clasped his hands as he looked out over the quiet street, his eyes squinting against the sun. "I'm trying real hard to talk through decisions these days and not keep things from people."

Michonne nodded. She knew Rick still dealt with the guilt of his plan to steal guns from the armory and the fallout of his bad decisions.

She placed her hand on his shoulder and he looked over at her. "I know you're trying, Rick, I know. You've proven your leadership to these people these past couple of weeks. You're doing great."

"Thanks, that means a lot," Rick's eyes moved over her face and Michonne realized they were sitting hip to hip on the porch steps and their faces were mere inches apart. She could feel the warmth of his breath and took a deep breath of her own as she jerked her hand off his shoulder.

"So, what did you need to run by me?" _Breathe in. Breathe out._

"Our supplies are running low and I'm concerned about weapons and ammo. We need everyone to be armed if it comes down to it and, as it stands, we have enough guns for only a quarter of the population. There are knives and axes but those are only effective against the walkers," Rick looked out over the street again, this time at a boy walking his dog down the sidewalk. "I'm thinkin' we need to go on a supply run. A big one. For food, medicine and guns."

Michonne nodded. "That makes sense, but where? I'd imagine the immediate area is picked clean after all this time."

"I spoke with Aaron. He lived here before...everything...and he remembered that there was a huge shopping center that had just opened in Charlottesville and it wasn't a very populated area. He's thinking it might have been missed by people passing through as it was on the outskirts."

"How far?"

"About 90 miles but some of the routes there are unchartered territory so the travel time is an unknown," Rick flexed his hands opened and closed and then clasped them loosely between his knees. "Aaron volunteered to navigate the run and I'd like to send four to go with him, in two vehicles. That should be enough to provide coverage and to gather the supplies but not leave us down too many here."

Michonne nodded her agreement. "That sounds good. Who were you thinking?" She looked over to see Rick looking at the ground, his hands clenched. What could he be so stressed about?

"Daryl, Glenn, Spencer and Heath."

Ah...that was it. He didn't have her on the list, even though she had regularly gone on runs with Daryl at the prison and she was an expert with a weapon that didn't need to be reloaded, a huge asset when traveling into the unknown.

"Is that why you're running this by me now? Because you don't want me to go?"

Rick nodded. "I don't want you to go and I didn't want to have this discussion in front of everyone else."

Michonne stood up and walked down the steps so she could stand in front of Rick as she needed the advantage of height. "Rick, I appreciate you talking about this in private, I really do, but I have to disagree with your decision. This is a huge run and you know it makes the most sense for me to go along. I'm the most experienced doing this besides Daryl and Glen. You can't keep me here."

"I can and I will." Rick stared at her with determination, his jaw clenched.

"No, _Officer_ , you can't. We're _partners_. Deanna is leveraging you for defense of this place but you are not authorized to issue decrees. This place needs weapons, let me go get them. Daryl, Glenn and I know what we're doing. Keep Spence here and I'll go. That's your best chance to get this done."

"Michonne I..."

"No, Rick. Just no. I've been building walls and traps and patrolling this town a hundred times since we got here. I've cooked and dusted...dusted! I've had barbecues and played cards. _None_ of which is _me_. Who I am. Let me do this. Let me be useful again. Let me..."

"You are useful! Right here! With Carl and Judith and...and me! You belong here with us, not out there!" Rick had stood up during his tirade and now stood toe to toe with her, his chest heaving with his breaths.

That's it then, Michonne thought. Once again, he's worried. Okay, different tact this time. She lowered her voice to soothe him. "Rick. Listen to me. I get it, you want me safe. I want you safe too. I want Carl safe. Judith," she waved her arms around her, "I want everyone safe. So _let me do this_. Let me contribute and do what I do best. Which is to be out there when I have to be. Let me go get the guns we need to keep us all safe. Okay?" She ended her plea on a whisper, her face turned up towards his, only two inches away. She saw the worry in his eyes as they roamed her face. She could imagine the dozen scenarios playing out in his head of everything that could possibly go wrong and as she watched him close his eyes in resignation, she knew she'd won.

Rick opened them and leaned down until their breaths mingled and Michonne's heart raced wildly. His words were a growl. "Fine. You're going. You have one day to get there and come back, do you hear me? Or I'm going to come after you. Understood?"

Lord and mercy...this man...Michonne's breaths came fast as she looked at Rick's blue eyes blazing in frustration and anger. Deliver me from ...get a _grip_ , girl. She stepped away in a panic.

"Understood."

* * *

The next morning, Michonne slammed the tailgate of the pickup after confirming that the supplies they were bringing with them were secure. She looked back at the conversion van to see Daryl and Heath doing the same as Glenn hugged Maggie goodbye. Michonne was proud of her friend as she saw Maggie put on a strong front for her husband. As she turned back towards the truck, she waved at Aaron as he approached from the other side. "All set, Aaron. We're ready when you are." He nodded and got into the driver's seat.

"Michonne, wait!" Michonne looked over her shoulder to see Rick jogging up to her. She had said goodbye to him and the kids when she left this morning. What was going...her thoughts fled as Rick drew her into a tight hug, completely enveloping her with his muscular arms. His mouth pressed a long kiss on her temple and she felt her arms wrapping around his waist in response.

"You stay safe and you run if it gets bad, do you hear me?" His words were a rough whisper in her ear. Words that only she could hear. She nodded as speech was impossible in this moment. "Go in and get out and _come home. Come home."_ Those last words were so quiet, they were barely a breath and then she was suddenly alone as he let go of her and walked away quickly. She knew she must have looked like a fool standing there by the truck with her eyes wide and her hand covering her racing heart. _Forget the run being dangerous. That man is going to be the death of me._

* * *

Michonne looked out the passenger window at the deserted streets as the miles flew by. Her thoughts were going to places that terrified her and she desperately needed to settle them down to more benign topics. Like bad guys and herds and her odds of surviving this trip. Anything but what was going on between her and Rick.

"If you slowly repeat a calming word for five minutes, you'll be able to relax yourself." Aaron's words jolted her out her reverie.

She turned her head to see Aaron glancing at her with a small smile. "What?"

"You're tense and agitated. Your hands are restless, breathing is elevated and you're muttering under your breath."

"I don't mutter."

"Okay, you were..." Aaron looked up as he searched for the words, "praying then? That's perfectly fine if you were but the prayer didn't sound very restful. It's stressing you out." Aaron's gentle gaze didn't back down from Michonne's glare. "I know some meditation techniques that are very calming. One of them is to repeat a positive word for five minutes. It clears the head."

Michonne sighed. He really was a sweet man. She knew from the moment she met him that he was the real deal. Now was the time to get to know him better and it would be a good distraction from...thoughts. "Sorry, you're right. I was muttering. And, yes, I'm tense. I have a lot on my mind, that's all."

Aaron watched the road ahead of them as he spoke. "I'm sure you do. You and Rick and everyone in your group has dealt with some pretty huge changes these past couple of weeks. It must seem like a dream some days." He glanced over at her as continued, "It's not, you know. A dream. It's your life now. You and Rick led your group to safety."

Michonne shook her head. "It was Rick's call to go. He led us there."

Aaron chuckled. "You forgot I was there in the barn that day. You told the group and Rick that you were going to Alexandria and he agreed. Smart man that he is."

Michonne rolled her eyes and smiled, "I won't argue semantics with you. I'm just glad that _we_ ," she ave him a pointed look, "decided to follow you. Your town is the best place we've had in a good long time. We just need to _keep_ it that way."

Aaron nodded and drove in silence for another few minutes before looking over at her again. "I'm usually a really good judge of people, you know. That's why Deanna sends me out to recruit. I can read body language and tones of voices and figure out a lot about people." He was silent for another minute so Michonne looked over at him to see if he was finished. He was staring at the road as if making a decision.

"And?" Michonne thought she'd help him out.

"And I was convinced that you and Rick were married," At Michonne's muffled choke, Aaron quickly rambled, "or at least a couple. Together. I thought you were together. In a relationship."

"I know what together means, Aaron. Why on earth would you think that?" _Why? What on earth did he see?_

"While I was watching you on the road," he looked over apologetically at the reminder that he had spied on them from a distance for days. "I saw two people who were leading a group through hell and you did it by leaning _on each other_. You consulted with each other, relied on each other and backed each other up," Aaron hurried his speech as he spied Michonne shaking her head in disbelief. "You were always by each other's side. You walked side by side. You slept side by...er...near each other. You fought near each other. And the group just accepted it. As if it had always been that way. And then in the barn? Seriously? If you were in my shoes watching you two in action up close," He nodded his head almost in a bragging manner, "you _definitely_ would have come to the same conclusion. Married couple. And, even though Daryl set me straight shortly after you all arrived here, I haven't seen anything in your or his behavior to make me think differently." Aaron looked over at Michonne after his speech and must have taken her wide eyes and open mouth to heart as he gave her a reassuring smile. "But that's just me. I'm sure everyone else knows you're just pals. 'Cuz...that's what you are, right? Pals?"

Michonne closed her eyes as her damn heart picked up speed again. "I just picked my meditation word and I'm going to repeat it and forget this conversation ever happened, got it?"

"Got it. Um...just out of curiosity...what word did you pick?"

Michonne opened one eye to stare him down. "I picked the word 'Silence.' You think that'll work to calm me down?"

Aaron nodded and swallowed as he stared at the road, "Uh...yes, that's a perfect word. Just perfect."

* * *

Today was a good day. Michonne smiled with anticipation as they drew closer to home. Aaron's guess had been spot on and they were able to fill the van and truck with canned food, over the counter medicine and, most importantly, weapons and ammo from the sporting goods store. It wasn't without its challenges as they had to contend with a few dozen walkers surrounding the shopping center but it wasn't anything they couldn't handle. Michonne rolled down the window to let the stench of walker blood leave the truck. She and the others definitely got their hands dirty on this run and would all need long hot showers when they returned.

"What the hell is that?" Aaron's panicked question jarred Michonne from her thoughts and she looked straight ahead to see huge billowing clouds of smoke coming up through the tree line.

Michonne's heart was in her throat. "Aaron, how far are we from home?" Her question was a whisper echoing in the cab of the truck.

Aaron's eyes were wide and his breathing escalated, "We're no more than three miles out. We're almost home..."

"No...nonono..." Michonne cupped her hand over her mouth and shook her head. The smoke was huge. It was bad. Oh God, no...

Aaron pulled the truck over in a spot between some trees, out of sight from the road and the others quickly followed suit in the van. They all jumped out with their weapons in hand. Michonne just stared at the smoke as the others discussed cutting through the woods on foot so as not to be spotted by anyone...bad...

Michonne barely heard their words as she took off running, her mind clearing of the present events and hurtling back to two years ago. To another run, another return that ended badly...NO! This was different. Everyone was _fine_. The smoke was from something they did. _It's fine_. Michonne pumped her arms and legs as fast as she could, ignoring the cries from the others to slow down. The minutes flew by as her only thoughts were to find them. Find her family. Find them safe.

Her family. Tears streamed down her face as she stopped in front of the gates that were down. Fire crackled in the distance and she heard the moans. The moans of the dead. So many moans. Cries racked her body as visions of the Atlanta refugee camp filled her mind. _All those walkers, the screams of the dying, her screams as she hacked her way through to get to Mike and Andre. Her screams as she found Mike huddled in the corner, out of it, bit, along with their friend Terry. Her cries as she saw her beautiful baby boy dangling from Mike's arms, his throat torn out._

As Michonne stared at the gate, the others caught up to her and she snapped back to the present with the noise they made. That's when she saw the walkers milling around. The town had been attacked. They had been attacked, the gate is down and now there were walkers everywhere. She listened carefully as did the others. It was quiet. There was no shouting, no cries for help. Just silence, other than the terrible moans.

 _Rick! I made it back. I'm safe. Oh God...I'm safe._ Michonne's knees gave out and she fell to the ground.

Not again. She won't make it this time. _Not this time_.


	6. Herd

**In honor of Season 6 premiering tonight, I wanted to get this key chapter out. It's a biggie and I hope you enjoy it. I changed a few things up from the canon story because, hey, it's the world I've created so why not?**

"Michonne. _Michonne, look at me_ ," Glenn's whispered plea pulled Michonne from the screaming in her mind and into the present. She was kneeling in the dirt under trees near the gate. The torn down, blown up gate that was now allowing a herd to pass through. Glenn knelt in front of her and his hands lightly gripped her arms. Her teary eyes met his panicked ones and she breathed in deep. _Maggie_. Maggie is in there. _All of the people we love are in there_. She looked at Glenn.

"I'm okay. I'm good." She pushed herself up off the ground and took a deep breath as Glenn and the others joined her. As she observed the walkers milling around the ragged opening, their incessant moans became white noise as she felt her faculties come back. Now was not the time to indulge or mourn. Now was the time to fight and kill and destroy until they found their people. She turned to the group.

"We go in quiet. No noise. We split up and clear each house until we find who we find. We meet at Deanna's house in 30 minutes." Her whispered commands were met with nods of agreement as everyone checked their weapons and got ready to go in. Daryl and Heath went in first and crept in towards the west side of town with Aaron and Glenn following close behind them towards the east. Michonne went in last with only one destination in mind. The house she shared with her family. As she slowly made her way down the street, staying out of sight, her heart raced as she tried not to consider terrible possibilities. Possibilities that would bring her past forward.

The day she lost Andre, she wondered how she would go on. How does a mother live and function and... continue... without her child? With a heart that only reluctantly continued to beat? It had taken her several days of wandering aimlessly, barely conscious of the world around her, before she decided that she would find a way to navigate the terrible world she now found herself alone in because she wouldn't allow Andre's death be in vain. She would live for him so that there would be one person left in the world who remembered him. Who remembered his smile that would start small and shy and then blossom into pure joy at the drop of a hat. Who remembered his fears, his first Christmas, his desire for a pet rabbit and the way he threw his arms around her neck at bedtime so he could whisper, 'Love you mama.' She would live as long as she could, _for years_ , so that through her, her little boy could exist in some way.

Nearby moans snapped Michonne from her thoughts and she quickly pivoted on her foot to take out the walker that approached from the right. Her sword arced in the opposite direction in a fluid motion as she decapitated two more walkers. _Keep it quiet and keep moving_. She was almost there and the streets were still quiet. There! Her house. She walked the last thirty feet quickly and made her way to the narrow stretch of yard between her house and the one next door. _Please God_... _Please_...Michonne dispatched one more walker with her knife and then turned the knob on the side door. Yes! It was unlocked. Giving a quick look of prayer upwards, she took a deep breath and turned the handle. The door opened silently inward and she crept in.

 _Click_. Michonne looked up from closing the door to find herself six inches from the barrel of a gun. _Carl's gun._ Her heart once again racing, she looked up in the shadowed entryway to see Carl's beautiful face glowering at her. A second later, recognition dawned in his eyes and he quickly lowered his weapon as they fell into each other for a fierce embrace. Michonne closed her eyes and willed them not well up again as she clutched the boy close. "Thank God. You're okay. _Oh thank God_." She pulled apart to look Carl over. He was uninjured. Carl stared at her with wide eyes.

"There's a herd out there. How did you get here?" His fervent whisper was tinged with wonder.

Michonne smiled, her lips quivering with pent up emotion while she tried to put on a brave front for Carl. "Now come on, mister. You know I have my ways. After all this time, I've become a lot smarter than them, don't forget." Carl smiled and nodded. The sound of rapid, heavy footsteps sounded down the hall and a moment later, Rick rounded the corner.

"Carl! Where did you go..." Rick's fierce whisper cut off as he saw Michonne standing near the door. Without thinking, he ran to her side and drew her in close. He cupped the back of her head as he breathed into her ear. "You're here. I can't believe you're here," Words escaped Rick as he held her shaking body close for another minute, their racing hearts beating in tandem. His shirt became damp with her tears and he drew slightly away. Looking down at her damp eyes, he took in her relieved face, so grateful for her return and all that it meant. _She was home_. They were together. They would figure everything else out. _As long as they were together_. He gently wiped her tears away with his thumbs. "How did you..."

Michonne laughed and shook her head, "Don't you start. Question already asked and answered. Your turn. What the hell happened?" Michonne stared at Rick as a terrible worry consumed her, "Where is Judith?"

Rick shook his head. "I'll explain everything later. Judith was with Carol at Deanna's at the time of the attack and I refuse to think she's anywhere else but there. We've got to get outta here. Follow me." Rick led Michonne and Carl in the living room where Michonne was stunned to see six very frightened people sitting and standing. She surveyed the group and saw that they were all residents of the town and none from their immediate group. They were also all petrified which was understandable considering the safety they had enjoyed behind the walls up until now. They had little experience with single walkers let alone a whole herd. She sheathed her katana and turned to Rick.

"So what's the plan?" Now was the time for getting business taken care of. Now was the time to think, plan and act very quickly. Michonne tucked her wayward emotions way back in her mind and focused on the task at hand. Getting herself and everyone in this house to safety. She had faith in Rick's abilities and knew he would have a way out of this.

He didn't disappoint. "We have to get to Deanna's house. Her main floor is elevated and the structure is brick. It's the most secure building in town. The armory is between here and her house. We'll stop there to secure more weapons and then continue on. You, me Sasha, and some of the others can use the sniper rifles to pick off the walkers from the roof of Deanna's porch."

Michonne nodded her head. It was a solid plan except...for the six weeping, trembling, innocent people who have never been through this before. This was going to take a miracle to pull off. "We need camo to do this. And a lot of it."

Rick picked up the large bag that was at his feet and pull out several ponchos. "Carol worked with Olivia to supply each house with these just in case. Everyone wears one and we blend in."

Michonne tilted her head to the weeping and sniffling in the living room. "We can't step one foot out of this house unless everyone is able to be completely silent. They'll be on us in a second with all of this noise."

"I've tried telling them all that. But they're terrified. You want to give it a shot?"

Michonne quickly walked to the fireplace, putting her in the middle of the group of residents. Her gaze took in the group and she recognized the middle aged couple, Jane and Russ Marcus on the couch and the Sumner sisters, two twentysomethings, huddled together in the corner. They seemed to have it mostly together. The majority of the noise was coming from the hairdresser Jessie and her son, Sam. They were clutching each other and quietly weeping, their pale faces terrified. Michonne held back a sigh as she reminded herself that this was all new to these people. And they were in a very bad situation indeed.

Michonne spoke a low tone that carried just far enough to be heard, "Listen everyone, I know you're scared. I am too. There are a lot of them out there and they're not going away. We can't stay here because there will just be more of them coming and we'll be trapped here for longer than we're able to survive. We have to get to the weapons and to a safer house so that we can take them out. We have to do this quickly because each hour that the walls our down, we go from bad to worse. You want to save your town right? Your homes?" Heads nodded throughout the room. "Then you're going to have to take a deep breath and do exactly what we tell you. There is no room for error. Do you understand?" Michonne surveyed the room and was encouraged by the Marcus' and Sumners as they seemed to sit up a little straighter, their tears dried up. Jessie and her son were still shaking but had at least stopped the weeping. She nodded towards Rick.

Rick smiled at Michonne. _She's such a gift to all of us. Thank God she came home_. They would figure this out and they would be together. _Yes_. "Okay, everyone, quietly put these ponchos on and try not to talk. We need to be silent. Michonne and I will be right back." Rick gestured for Michonne to follow him to the back door. "We have to get at least three walkers. That should do it."

"I put one down right outside the house. If we got up the alley between the houses, we should be able to pick off two more easily." Michonne led Rick out the side door and they both crept silently along the house. Within seconds, a walker wandered into the alley and Rick made quick work of it with his machete with Michonne quickly lopping off the head of the one that followed. Dragging the walkers back to the house, they worked together to slice them open. Even though it was foul business, Michonne was full of adrenaline and thankful to be with her family. She felt like this was a second chance and failure wasn't an option.

When they were done Michonne led the residents out one by one in order for her and Rick to apply walker guts and blood all over their ponchos. They had to whisper encouragement and directives in the residents' ears because the smell was awful but silence was a necessity. Carl applied his own guts which made Michonne grin with pride. Finally, Jessie and her son came out and Michonne had to force herself not to roll her eyes as Jessie recoiled from the gore. _Think of it as a mud pack, lady_ , Michonne thought and then chastised herself for her cattiness. She had to remember that this woman had been sheltered for two years and this was traumatic for her. She whispered in her ear, "Breathe through your mouth and remember that this stuff is what gets us from here to safety. Okay?" Jessie gave a tentative nod and closed her eyes for the application. Rick did the same to Sam who was visibly shaking as he squeezed his eyes tight. Rick met Michonne's eye's over the Anderson's heads and they shared a worried look. By unspoken agreement, they kept Jessie and Sam between them as Rick led the group out of the alleyway and into the herd.

Michonne willed her heart to slow down. _Just like old times_ , she thought as she walked next to a rotting corpse. She observed the Sumners and Marcus' following their directions and walking with a slow, awkward gait with their heads tilted. Very good. Jessie and Sam shuffled their feet but she could hear their heavy, panicked breathing. _Jesus_. Putting herself between them and the herd, Michonne directed them silently to walk to the left. They needed distance, dammit. They were too loud. Rick slowly turned his head and glared blue daggers at Jessie. Michonne heard the woman gasp at the look but her heavy breathing settled and she saw her give her son's hand a squeeze. They were quiet for the next five minutes as their group made their way to Deanna's house, surrounded by the dead.

 _Just another walk in the park_ , Rick thought, as he matched his shuffling gait to the walker next to him. A corpse with no nose and with most of his skin rotted away. If we make it though today, I am going to treat Michonne and Carl to the best dinner I can find. He was surprised at how calm he was. The couple and the sisters were doing great and followed his directions to the letter. He let them go ahead of him as he hung back to help Michonne with the Andersons. _They better not blow this_. Don't these idiots know how to be quiet? Rick took a calming breath. Settle down Grimes. One of the idiots is a kid so go easy. Rick looked over at Carl, ambling along slightly ahead of him. Carl was just a kid but the things he had seen and done put him in a whole different category. He was so damn proud of him and knew that Carl could handle himself.

 _Boom_! A gunshot echoed throughout the streets, quickly followed by several more as Rick as his group swerved their head toward the sound. The walkers surrounding them turned and ambled towards the gunfire, drawn by the noise. Rick gave a silent word of thanks to whoever was shooting as it gave them the distraction they needed. He could see Deanna's house just a hundred feet ahead. We're going to make it. Thank God!

"Mommy, I have to go to the bathroom," Sam's whispered words may as well have been a scream considering their situation. Michonne shuffled as quickly as she could until she was practically on top of Sam. She hunched over to get closer to his ear.

"You can't talk. You can't go to the bathroom. You have to hold it in. We're almost there. _Just hold on_."

Sam's lips quivered and his eyes widened, "I'm sorry. I've been holding it for hours. I can't."

Michonne filled with dread as she saw two nearby walkers stop their shuffling and turn toward them. Shit! They were smelling the urine. As soon as Jessie saw the walkers head their way, she screamed, which drew two more and within seconds they were surrounded.

Rick pivoted when he heard the scream and saw Michonne and the Andersons surrounded, Michonne grabbing her katana and shoving the nearest one away with her hand. Jessie and Sam were crying and screaming as they cowered. Rick sprinted to them as he shouted at the rest of their group and Carl. "Run for the house. Do not stop. Run fast!"

Carl ran to his side. "I can help!" He had his long knife out and Rick swallowed his fear and simply nodded. He and Carl quickly approached the group and put down a walker each as Michonne took care of her second. The battle, along with the crying, drew the attention of more walkers. "Shut up!" Rick barked at the Andersons and they finally quieted down. "Stay in the middle of our circle, you two, got it?" Michonne, Carl and Rick formed a loose circle around Jessie and Sam as they battled the incoming walkers while still trying to move towards the house.

More gunshots were firing, this time much closer, but Rick couldn't afford to be distracted as he focused on the task at hand. He felt comforted by the sounds of Carl and Michonne behind him and knew they were doing okay. They were within fifty yards of Deanna's house when suddenly Sam broke out of their circle and made a run for it, Jessie clumsily running after him. "No! Stay here!" Rick shouted but it was too late. Three walkers came around the corner of Deanna's porch and were on Jessie and Sam in a matter of seconds. Rick turned away from their screams to address Michonne and Carl as they put down two more walkers.

Gunfire sounded nearby but couldn't drown out the screams of the Andersons as they were consumed by the dead in the middle of the street. Michonne grabbed Carl's hand, "Come on. We're going to make a run for it," She and Rick shared a nod and they all ran towards Deanna's house, gunfire sounding all around them.

Who the hell was shooting? Rick thought as they scrambled down the street. He looked up to see Deanna with a semi-automatic pistol firing wildly at the walkers heading toward her. Her eyes were panicked and her mouth open in terror as her shots pinged all over the street. "Deanna, NO!" Rick screamed but it was too late. Deanna's shots went over the heads of the walkers she was aiming and peppered the ground in front of them. Michonne screamed as Carl dropped to the ground.

Rick felt his feet moving in slow motion as he pivoted to see Carl fall, his face covered in blood. _No no no!_ Not Carl, not Carl. Rick ran to Carl and turned him over, checking for a heartbeat. Thank God...it was there. The gunshots stopped as Deanna lost the battle to the walkers surrounding her. He looked up at Michonne, tears streaming down his face. Her eyes were wide and panicked as she looked at Carl. "We have to get him to Denise. Help me get him to Denise, _please_." His last word was a ragged rasp but Michonne nodded and held her katana out in front of her. Rick picked up Carl and threw him over his shoulder as he was too big to cradle. Praying that he wasn't hurting him, Rick ran behind Michonne, past the two groups of walkers feeding on the fallen residents. They ran past Deanna's house, Michonne's sword putting down two, then three walkers before them. Rick could barely see through the tears in his eyes but he forced his feet to run as he knew each minute was critical to saving Carl.

Finally they reached the infirmary as more gunshots echoed throughout the streets. Michonne opened the door and ran for Denise while Rick carried Carl into one of the rooms. Laying him down on a hospital bed, Rick breathed heavily as he took in Carl's blood soaked face. Oh my god, my son, _my son_! Rick dropped to his knees beside the bed and held his hand over Carl's heart, willing it to beat. Relieved to feel the faint thumping, Rick dropped his head onto Carl's chest and stayed there until Denise and Michonne returned.

Michonne laid her hand on Rick's shoulder, her heart breaking as she looked at his slumped form hovering near Carl. "Rick, Denise is here. She's going to take care of him." Rick looked up, his blue eyes wild as he looked at Michonne for reassurance. "Carl is going to be okay, Rick. We have to believe that, okay?" Michonne wouldn't allow herself to think any differently. _Sweet Carl_. That sweet, sweet boy was going to be okay. Any other outcome wasn't even a consideration.

Denise's terse tone cut through the stricken silence of the room. "Michonne, get Rosita and Heath. They're out back. I need their help. Carl needs surgery _now_." Just then, the moans grew louder from outside as the herd made their way to the infirmary, attracted by the commotion that had just occurred. Michonne sprinted to the back to get Rosita and Heath and on her way back to the room, looked outside the windows. _Holy Mother of God_. The infirmary was surrounded by what looked to be a hundred walkers, possibly more. Whether it was the blood or the noise that had gone on moments before, they were approaching quickly and were fired up. This was bad, very bad.

Michonne ran back to the surgical room where Heath and Rosita were helping Denise prepare for surgery. She pulled Rick up and out of the room. He was still out of it, looking over his shoulder at Carl. Michonne grabbed his shoulders and turned him toward her. "Rick. Look! The herd. _They're here_." Rick snapped his head to the window and Michonne saw his eyes clear as he focused on the imminent threat.

Rick took in a breath and felt his mind empty. He put Carl's surgery and grave injury out of his head as he looked out the windows. _Here was an enemy he could fight_. He was helpless in the hospital room. He wasn't helpless out here. He looked over at Michonne as she too looked out the window, her chest heaving with rapid breaths. If they didn't fight back the walkers, they would take apart this house within the hour. They needed to give Denise time to save Carl. He looked at his gun with the six bullets and his machete and then looked over at Michonne holding her katana, a knife sheathed at her hip.

Is this it? Is this what it comes down to? Two broken people meeting in hell and healing each other only to go out like this? Is this how we end? _Me and Michonne?_ Rick felt a calm come over him as he squinted at the dead approaching the building. _No!_ We have more time together. The two of us. Judith. Carl. This isn't how it ends. This isn't our story.

Michonne willed her heart to stop racing as she took in the approaching herd. We have to give Carl a chance. We have to do this. We _will_ do this, dammit! She looked over at Rick, at his dear face, his beautiful face, and couldn't stop the small smile from forming. I love this man and I will walk into hell for him. I will walk into hell and laugh at the devil himself if I have to. No matter what happens, we will give Carl a chance.

Michonne's eyes widened as Rick marched over to where she stood and cupped her face in his hands. His face an inch from hers, his growled whisper made her heart stop.

"We don't die. Do you hear me? _We don't die_." Michonne stared into his blue eyes and it was as if he had given her a shield of armor. She felt stronger, faster, smarter. _We can do this_. She smiled and willed him to see all of the love she felt in that moment.

"We don't die."

Rick stared at her a moment longer and then opened the door. They walked out to the porch and looked at the sea of the dead and then at each other one more time before taking out their weapons and going to war.


	7. Living

**Phew! Just in time for another TWD episode! This chapter is a doozy as it takes us through war and its aftermath. I hope you enjoy reading it as much as I did writing it. Keep the feedback coming. I love it!**

 _It was a dance_. A silent, graceful dance with Death. Through unspoken agreement, Rick and Michonne entered the herd, weapons in both hands, backs to each other. As Michonne decapitated the walker to her right, her mind cleared of her worry for Carl and her possible death. Her entire focus was on the corpses reaching for her and keeping her body moving. Her heart stopped racing as she entered an almost meditative state. As her sword arced with her right hand, her knife jabbed with her left. She kicked two walkers away while she pivoted in the other direction. _Slice...Cut..._ over and over again until she was covered in guts and blood. She could hear Rick breathing at her back as they moved in tandem. Each walker killed was one less that would attack the infirmary. Keep moving away, step by step. We had to give Carl time.

 _Carl!_ Rick screamed Carl's name in his head as he cut a swath with Michonne through the herd. Sweat flew off of him as, with maniacal precision, he sliced into the walkers ahead and to the side. Heads rolled, blood covered him and he lost count. He was infuriated and crazy with panic those first few moments they were out there. A million things could go wrong. He could fall in the next moment and Michonne would be alone. _No!_ _Don't think that_! Suddenly, Rick quieted the screaming in his mind and just listened. Michonne was to his back and she was silent. She was barely breathing heavy. Yes! Clear your head, Grimes! It's just us and the dead. They can't think. You can. Just do it. Rick took a deep breath as his body worked on muscle memory and continued to slice into the walkers.

In the first few minutes of fighting, there were twenty destroyed walkers at their feet. Rick and Michonne tirelessly moved forward, kicking and pushing and using their weapons with relentless and ruthless force. The fighting simply drew more upon them, however, until they were surrounded and the walkers were closing in. Michonne took in the scene before her with a feeling of dread. _There are too many. I won't be able to raise my sword soon. There won't be room_. Rick blinked through the sweat in his eyes as he yanked his machete out of a walker's skull and threw his shoulder into a walker making a grab for him. There were more than ever surrounding them. There wasn't going to be room...

Michonne made a decision. _I will fight until my last breath. I will give Carl every moment I have, even after getting bit_. She would find it in her to put down as many of these things as she could to give Carl a chance. She just wished she and Rick could have...

Rick made peace with the fact that he was going to die in this herd. This was it but, before he died, he was taking as many of these bastards down with him as he could. Carl had to live. Judith had to live. His family would be okay. He'd make sure of it. His breath caught. _If only he and Michonne had_...

As the walkers made one last push towards Rick and Michonne, they instinctually reached for each other's left hands and held on while fighting with their right. They clasped tightly, their hands saying what they dared not say out loud. The love, the hopes and dreams they had...

 _Here we come, Death, catch us if you can_...

 **Boom! Thud!** All at once, the six walkers around Rick and Michonne dropped amid gunfire, two of them with arrows embedded in their skulls. More walkers fell on the outskirts amid a dozen raised blades. Rick and Michonne looked up and saw Sasha, Spencer and three other Alexandrians on the porch roofs shooting at the walkers around them, waving them forward. Daryl, Glenn, Morgan, Abe and more residents attacked the herd from the outside, clearing a path for Rick and Michonne. "Get your asses over to Deanna's you two! Shoot them from her roof! _Now_!" Abe's barked orders were their salvation and Rick and Michonne sprinted towards Deanna's house, just as a loud horn sounded from the other side of town. The horn drew the walkers away and they started to spread out, making it easier for the group to pick them off one by one.

Rick and Michonne ran, their hands still clasped, tears in both their eyes at the miracle that had just happened. _Jesus, we might live after all_ , Michonne thought, her grin widening with exhilaration. _I can't believe we're still here. Holy shit. We're here_. Rick sent a glance to the sky to whoever was listening as they approached Deanna's porch. With a nod toward Michonne, he boosted her up from the railing and watched as she pulled herself up onto the roof where two rifles were waiting. Rick quickly followed her, his heart beating with adrenaline. He grabbed the rifle Michonne held out to him and they both went into prone positions and started to pick off the walkers from the safety of their perch. The horn stopped, having done its job of distracting the herd and now the twenty or so people surrounding the walkers were able to methodically put them down.

Rick's raspy whisper finally broke their silence as he sighted two more walkers through his scope and shot them. "We did it. We did it, Michonne."

Michonne had to blink through tears to clear her sight through the scope. She steadied her hands as they started to tremble. She needed to smile, just for a few brief moments before reality hit them again. "Of course we did, Grimes. Did you have any doubt?" Rick's chuckle at her dry tone was everything and got her through the next twenty minutes of shooting.

Finally, every walker was down and Rick helped Michonne off the roof. He grabbed her hand and gazed down at her, knowing they only had a minute or two before the others joined them. "Michonne, I..."

Michonne placed her hand gently on Rick's mouth, her eyes wide with unspoken emotion and her lips trembling, "Shh...there will be time for that later. I know, I know...okay?" Rick nodded, his heart full to bursting as his breathing quickened. _There will be time, I'll make sure of it_. They unclasped their hands just as the others joined them.

"You crazy sons of bitches! I have never, in all my days of shit storms, **ever** seen something like that!" Abe jogged up to them, his eyes lit up with adrenaline and shining through the blood caked on his face. "You two were in the middle of a goddamned herd like it was a walk in the park. Why the hell didn't you wait for us?"

Michonne looked over at Rick as the reality crashed in and overtook the euphoria they had briefly felt at cheating death. She spoke from the top step of the porch at the growing crowd of their rescuers. "Carl's been shot and is at the infirmary. Rick and I had to fight back the herd to give Dr. Cloyd time to help him. He.." Her voice cracked with emotion as she started to lose the battle of keeping everything in. "He needs surgery." She gazed out at their friends and the townspeople who had come to their aid. "Thank you everyone. Thank you helping us..for saving us..." Her last words ended on a whisper as she grabbed Rick's hand for strength.

Glenn ran up and stood next to them on the steps. His concerned gaze took them both in as he clasped their shoulders and spoke softly, "We'll take care of all of this. You go to Carl. Maggie and I'll check in later to see if you need anything, okay?" He didn't wait for their nods before addressing the group and assigning people to clean up and fortifying duties.

Rick and Michonne ran back to the infirmary, reality crashing in once again. _Please let Carl be okay_ , Rick prayed. _My boy. He needs to be okay_. Michonne looked over at Rick's panicked face and her heart broke for him and for herself as she wondered what they would find at the infirmary. _He's so young. So innocent. He has to live. This world needs him_. She repeated those words as they made their way into the infirmary and stood outside the closed door.

Listening at the door, Rick and MIchonne breathed in relief at the sounds of Denise speaking with Heath and Rosita, indicating that the surgery continued. Carl was still alive. They had done it. They had bought him the time he needed. Rick looked at Michonne, his breathing ragged, and took in her beautiful face, her eyes silently filling with relieved tears. She loves him, Rick thought. She loves Carl with every fiber of her being. _I'm not alone in this_. Feeling stronger, Rick took Michonne's hand gently and led her to the sofa in the infirmary waiting room. Sitting next to her, he continued to clasp her hand lightly, giving and taking comfort with the simple touch.

Almost two hours later, Denise came out of the surgery room, removing the mask from her face as she took in an exhausted but cleaned up Rick and Michonne sitting on the couch, Carol and Maggie in chairs next to them. At her entrance, everyone stood and Denise noted that Rick clasped Michonne's hand like a lifeline. _Interesting_ , she thought. _There's a story there_. "Carl made it out of surgery with his vitals strong. He should pull through." More hand clasping as relieved tears filled Rick and Michonne's eyes.

Oh thank God. _Thank God_. Rick felt his knees weaken with relief at Dr. Cloyd's words. Carl was alive and he was going to survive this. His relief was short lived as he took in the doctor's stoic expression. "What else? What's wrong?" Whatever it was, they could get through this. Anything. They survived a herd. They could survive whatever injury Carl had.

Denise gestured for everyone to sit down. "Carl took bullet fragments that ricocheted off the ground into his face and skull." She waited while that news sunk in, "He's very lucky he didn't take a direct hit or he would've been killed immediately. Instead, he absorbed small pieces that I was able to remove. Unfortunately...," Deep breath here, "Unfortunately, he took a large fragment directly into his left eye and I couldn't repair the damage to it. It was too extensive. I had to remove the eye."

Everyone gasped except Rick. My son is alive. Carl is going to be okay. We'll figure it out. It's an eye, not a heart, not a lung. He'll be okay. He looked at Dr. Cloyd's concerned face, "What else? What else is wrong?" Whatever it is, we can handle it. Carl is strong. He has people who love him. Rick felt Michonne's hand in his and sat up straighter. We can do this.

"As I said, Carl was hit with several fragments and some of them fractured his skull. There is a possibility that he may have sustained brain damage. Unfortunately, I don't have equipment here to confirm that. We'll have to wait until he wakes up to know for sure. Even then, we may not know the extent as the damage may be delayed or it may be short term. There are just a lot of unknowns at this point."

Michonne sucked in a breath as she felt Rick tense beside her. Oh Carl. That poor boy. She gently squeezed Rick's hand, trying to reassure him even through her own heartbreak. "When can we see him?" They had to see for themselves that he was okay. The rest they would handle as it came their way.

"You can go in now but he's still out of it. He should be out of the anesthesia in about 30 minutes or so."

Michonne let go of Rick's hand to allow him to go to Carl first but he wasn't having it. "You come too," his low rasp reached out to her and she walked in with him, leaving the others to speak with Dr. Cloyd.

He's so pale. Oh God..just like last time. Rick fell to his knees beside Carl's bed laying his hand on his son's arm. It wasn't even two years since the last time Carl got shot and here he was again. _Why can't I keep him safe? Why does he keep getting hurt? My boy. My son. You need to be safe. I'll keep you safe_.

Michonne pulled up a chair and sat on the other side of Carl's bed, gently tracing her finger on his hand, willing him to feel her touch and come back to them. She took in the gauze bandage covering his destroyed eye and promised herself that she would never take a moment of her life for granted again. It could all be taken away in a second. That's all it took. Just a second and the people she loved could be taken away. _Again_. She'd make each day count because that's all she might have left.

"Dad?" Carl's whisper jolted Rick out of his exhausted daze and he lifted his head to see Carl staring at him out of a bleary eye. Carl's hand came up to touch the gauze bandage. "Why is it so dark? Why does my head hurt? _Dad_?" Rick quickly stood up to hover over Carl and trying to keep him calm. He looked over at Michonne as she stood on the other side, her hand gently touching Carl's arm, concern in her eyes.

"Sshhh...it's okay Carl. You're going to be okay. You were hurt when a herd invaded Alexandria. We were attacked, do you remember?" Rick heard the door open and knew Dr. Cloyd was at his back, listening to his conversation. "Carl do you remember the attack?"

Carl closed his good eye, his face screwed up in concentration. "There were firebombs. A truck crashed the gate. There were men invading. We killed them but the walls were down so the walkers came in."

"Yes! That's it Carl! You remember, good boy. You were hit by stray bullet fragments and your eye was hit." Rick shuddered as he watched Carl bring his hand slowly up to touch his bandage.

"My eye? Is my eye okay? Dad? Dad!" Carl started to get agitated and tried to rise out of bed but Rick and Michonne gently pushed him back down.

"Carl, your eye was damaged. It's gone, son. It's gone. _I'm sorry_." Rick felt his eyes well up as he took in the panic on Carl's face. Carl collapsed back on the bed, closing his eye as he dealt with the devastation.

Michonne ran a soothing hand down Carl's arm, her heart breaking for Rick as she took in his guilt-stricken expression. He was taking this all on his shoulders, taking the blame for Carl's injuries. Oh Rick. She'd help to make this right. Carl trusted her. He would allow her to help him recuperate...

"Who are you?" Michonne took her eyes off of her hand at Carl's abrupt question. Her stricken eyes met his curious one as her breath stopped. _No!_ Carl stared at her for another long moment, unaware of the panic running through the room. Suddenly, recognition dawned, "Oh I know you. You're the lady with the sword. You brought formula for Judith."

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Later that night, Michonne lowered herself onto the cot in one of the exam rooms, exhaustion hitting her like a ton of bricks. After Carl's shocking statement, silence rang through the room for several moments before Michonne instinctually answered Carl and confirmed his guess. It was important that he feel validated and confident through his healing process. That was more important than any pain or suffering she might feel at his not remembering a year's worth of shared memories and experiences. She finished her conversation with Carl quickly while Rick stared at her with wide, stunned eyes. She then made a quiet and quick exit, leaving Rick and Dr. Cloyd with Carl.

After seeing Judith settled with Carol back at the house and confirming that temporary walls had been set up to close off the wall breach, Michonne showered and dressed again then returned to the infirmary. Rosita showed her to an exam room where she could sleep and let her know that Rick was showering and should be out shortly.

Was it just this morning that she left on a run, Rick making it clear that she had to return? And, now, here she sat, having battled a hundred walkers, almost dying in the process, almost losing Carl and now having to deal with this boy, _a boy she loved like her own_ , not knowing her? Michonne drew her knews up to her chest and looked out the window at the clear sky with its bright stars.

She _did_ return from the run. She'd battled a hundrend walkers and _lived_. Carl _lived_. They were _all_ alive and it was a miracle. A miracle in a world that didn't deal those out anymore. She would hold onto that in the coming days. She knew what mattered. _Life and the living_. The details they would just have to figure out. She and Rick were good at that. With a resolute nod of her head, Michonne came to peace with what was in store.

"Hey," Rick's low greeting drew her gaze to the doorway to find him relaxed and leaning against it, hair damp and feet bare under the set of loaned scrubs he wore. Was it wrong that she felt a surge of attraction at the sight of him in scrubs, looking like every woman's dream doctor? _Get it together, girl_. She took in his concerned gaze and realized they hadn't discussed Carl's memory loss. He was worried about her.

"Hey yourself. I see you're making yourself at home. Nice duds." She gestured at his scrubs as she drew her knees down and relaxed her back against the wall. Rick chuckled as he passed his hand through his hair in a nervous gesture she found endearing.

"Yeah, I didn't want to leave Carl to go home so Dr. Cloyd was nice enough to loan me some clean clothes. They didn't have much variety so..." Rick sat down on the cot next to Michonne, heaving a tired sigh as he mirrored her position.

They sat in silence for a few minutes, each ruminating over the day they just had and the challenges that were ahead of them. It was a companionable silence, one that comforted Michonne. _We can handle anything as long as we have each other_.

"Dr. Cloyd believes Carl will be able to come home in a few days as long as he promises to take it easy. She's going to ask Mrs. Paulson, one of the residents, to make an eyepatch...," Rick's voice hitched and Michonne turned her head his way. He swallowed hard and looked pained, heavy burdens settling on his broad shoulders once again. "Michonne, he...barely remembers Judith. Lori's death is fresh in his mind and he's mourning her all over again. He cried for her, wanting her here." Rick passed his hand over his face as emotion overtook him. "He barely knows you, Michonne. _You_! He doesn't remember the comic books, the candy, our time on the road, none of it. It's all foggy to him, he says." The more upset Rick got, the calmer Michonne felt. _I've got you, my friend. I've got you and won't let you fall._

"Rick." Michonne laid her hand on Rick's and drew it away from his face, "It's going to be okay. We'll work through this."

"No! It's not okay! _He doesn't know you!_ He lost his eye! How is he going to shoot, Michonne? How is he going to protect himself? His left side is blind. They can attack him and _he won't see them_. It's not okay, do you hear me? I failed him again. I told everyone I could defend this place, I could protect them and what happened? We got attacked. Our wall came down. And, Carl got shot. Again. _And I couldn't stop it._ " Rick clenched his fists and pounded the mattress in frustration, the stress of the day picking away at him piece by piece.

Michonne let him vent, let him get it all out while she let the pieces of the puzzle fall into place for her. She shifted so that she faced Rick, one leg dangling over the side of the cot, one leg tucked up underneath her. She placed her hand over his clenched fist and waited for him to relax.

"Rick, listen to me. _Look at me_ ," Michonne waited until Rick's devastated and guilt stricken gaze met hers. "I know this is hard. I'm hurting too. You want Carl to be well. I do too. I want Carl to know me. I want him to know Judith," Michonne took a calming breath as the realization of the tough road ahead settled in. "But you know what? You know what I'm going to tell Carl when he's ready to listen? I'm going to tell him that his dad entered a herd of a hundred walkers today with six bullets and a machete _and won_. I'm going to tell him that his dad is the reason he's alive and the reason his baby sister is alive. His dad is the reason I have a family again and a home and _a reason to live_. His dad is the bravest man I know, the most selfless man I know and his dad is going to become a leader _that this world needs_. And I'm going to tell him how damn lucky he is to have Rick Grimes as his father. And how lucky I am to have Rick Grimes as my friend," Michonne's fervent words echoed through the quiet room and her heart raced as she waited for Rick's response. Come on Rick. _Stay with me_. Carl needs you. Judith needs you. _I need you._

Rick felt a calm come over him, a warmth that spread thoughout his body as he gazed at Michonne's wide eyes and her mouth still parted from her impassioned speech. _This woman makes me feel 10 feet tall. Like I can do anything. Is that really what she sees_? He thought quickly of their history together, everything they'd been through, the support they'd given each other and he smiled. He turned his hand over so it grasped Michonne's and he turned to face her. Looking into her beautiful brown eyes, the calm within him grew and he felt stronger, lighter. _It's her. She does that to me. She lightens me_...Rick's thoughts broke off as a realization hit him. _She lightens me because she shares my load. She shares my burdens. My pain is her pain. My sorrow is her sorrow_. Humbled, he stared at their clasped hands as he spoke, not daring to look her in the eye, "And you know what I'm going to say when Carl is ready to listen? I'm going to say that the lady with the sword is the best person he will ever know in his entire life. That she's brave and smart and caring and fearless. That he's lucky to have her in his life and that his dad..." Rick took a deep breath, "that _I_ am the luckiest son of a bitch that ever walked this planet because having this woman in my life makes me feel like I can slay dragons. And she makes me..." He looked up in that moment, his heart racing as he gazed into her eyes once more, mere inches from his face. Her breath became his breath.

"She makes me want to live again."

Michonne felt Rick's words race through the depths of her soul and back again as she stared into his blazing blue eyes. His warm hand clasped hers as his other hand cupped her cheek with reverence. _Oh Dear God, save me_...all conscious thought fled as she felt Rick's firm lips meet hers in a gentle kiss. Their lips fit perfectly together, warmth feeding warmth and Michonne leaned forward to get closer. They didn't touch except for their hands clasping but their lips melded and moved together as one. Quiet sighs filled the darkened room as Michonne felt her world get brighter. _Oh this man knows how to kiss_ , she thought as she brought her hand to his shoulder. _How am I ever going to.._.

Rick's heart raced. It's just a simple kiss, chaste almost. But it was everything because it was with Michonne. He broke off and cupped her face with both hands, resting his forehead on hers as he stared into her eyes. They were both breathing heavy, Michonne's hands resting on his thighs and Rick knew this was just the beginning. Groaning he tilted her head to the side and went in again, this time parting her lips with his tongue and drawing her in closer so that she was practically in his lap. He wrapped his arms around her as he explored her with his mouth, his tongue sliding in an out with increasing fervency. Michonne moaned deep in her throat and pushed her fingers into his hair, pulling him even closer as her tongue touched his. _Jesus...I want this woman. I want her now_. Mouths open against each others, moans filling the room, Rick pushed Michonne down on the cot mattress, an overwhelming need to be one with her overcoming him.

Michonne almost came apart in a ball of flames as she felt Rick's body cover hers on the cot, his mouth moving down her throat and his hand sliding up her side. Oh my god...it had been so long and this felt so damn right...

"Dad!" Carl's scream echoed throughout the infirmary, jolting Rick and Michonne out of their embrace. Rick sat up and helped Michonne to right her shirt, which had ridden up. Rick swallowed hard, looking at the door and then back at Michonne, her chest heaving.

"Michonne, I..."

"Shh...go...Carl needs you. _Go_."

Rick looked at her for another long moment then nodded and left to comfort Carl.

Michonne dropped back on the bed, her hand going to her swollen lips.

Their friendship just got a whole lot more complicated.


	8. Recovery

**This chapter has something for Richonne and Carchonne fans alike. There is so much story to tell, I just can't shorten my chapters! Thanks for coming along for the ride everyone. Your feedback is everything!**

"I see how you are. You're hoping for more of Carol's yummy applesauce, aren't you? Well, can't say as I blame you. It _is_ the best." Michonne gently pushed small pieces of ham towards Judith as they both sat in the kitchen, bright morning sunlight pouring through the windows. Michonne returned home last night after leaving a note for Rick. She knew that he would be with Carl all night and felt the need to check in on Judith and, if she were honest with herself, put some distance between her and that kiss.

 _Kisses_. Multiple kisses. Stroking...caresses. Michonne lost focus on the tray in front of her, Judith's happy babbling fading away as she relived those blistering moments in the darkened exam room. It was as if a tiny match had been lit and an inferno consumed the both of them. In just seconds, they were moving to the point of no return and would have gone there if not for Carl screaming out.

Carl. _Oh God_ , that poor boy. Michonne had tossed and turned all night with thoughts of everything that had happened and worries about how they would all go on. She shook her head as she put on a smile for Judith, who was now staring at her with an adorable wrinkled brow, "I'm okay, girlfriend. Just thinking about some grown up stuff, is all. Now where were we? Oh yes, you eating ham and me getting my head on straight..."

Rick shut the door behind him with a quiet click and leaned against it in exhaustion, closing his eyes. He had been up all night with Carl, alternating between reassuring him, straight out lying to him that everything was going to be okay and then explaining to him what happened to Hershel and Beth. The only blessing about his memory loss was that he barely knew Tyrese and didn't know Bob or Noah at all so those deaths wouldn't impact him all over again. Carl was terrified, in pain and full of anger over what happened to him. They were going to have a long road...

The sound of Judith's high pitched giggles jarred Rick out of his stupor and led him to the kitchen where he spied Michonne attempting to feed Judith applesauce, her shoulders shaking from her own laughter. All it took was the mere sight of her and every one of his senses was on alert and his heart began to race. There was unfinished business here. He couldn't fix his son but he could set things straight with Michonne. He needed to have something he could control, _something he could see through_. He walked into the kitchen, alerting them to his presence. Michonne looked over her shoulder, took him in with a concerned glance and then put on a smile. _Why did she always have to be the stronger of us, dammit_? "Can we talk?"

Michonne's eyes widened slightly at his abrupt question but she quickly turned to wipe Judith's face and hands and pull her out of the highchair. Holding the baby in her arms, she gestured to the living room, "Lead the way."

Rick dropped onto the couch and watched as Michonne sat at the other end, bouncing Judith on her knee. "You want me to take her?"

"Nah, I'm good. Judy and I are pals today, aren't we Judy?" Michonne's light hearted tone reminded Rick that they were going to have a serious conversation in front of his baby girl and he took a deep breath to gather strength. He stared at Michonne for a long moment, recalling the turn their friendship took the night before. It had happened and he was going to make sure things kept going the way they were supposed to.

"You left without saying goodbye." _Jesus_...that was smooth Grimes.

Michonne's brow arched as she continued to bounce Judith and gave her a toy to play with. "I _left_ after leaving you a note and I _left_ in order to give you much needed time with Carl. It did me no good to stay as my presence would only confuse him. I'm sorry if that upset you."

Rick sighed as he wished he could start over. "I get it. I understand. I just didn't like it. I don't ever want you feel chased away, that you're not needed. I don't want you to leave, ever."

"Rick, look at me. I'm holding your daughter while wearing half her lunch on my pant leg. I'm _here_. I'm not going anywhere, I promise."

"You promise? You sure you can do that? You know...sticking around wasn't exactly your strong suit back at the prison. You sure this house and living together isn't too much for you? You sure..." Rick's agitated tone, combined with his bouncing knee and twitching hand clued Michonne in very quickly to his state of upset and she rose to put Judith in her playpen on the other side of the room.

Michonne sat back down, closer to Rick and took his jittery hands into hers, which immediately made him go still. She held his gaze for the first time since their kiss and felt strength course through her body. They could do this. _They had to_. "Rick, I'm not going anywhere. You know that. This is my home, _our_ home. I'm all in, understood?" Her soft question didn't seem to do it as he continued to just stare at her, his hands gripping hers. "We're family. We're too close and have been through too much to allow it to fall apart just because of a ki..."

Rick jolted to life at that last statement, "No! Don't you say it. It wasn't just a kiss and you know it. You felt it just like I did. That kiss was _everything_. It's been building up between us and you can't deny that. We're _not_ just friends. Last night _wasn't_ just a mistake we have to get through. Last night was _us_ and we're not going to pretend it didn't happen. We're not!" Rick wouldn't allow Michonne to brush this under the rug. His feelings for her were real and he wanted to keep them close. _He had to_. There was no going back...

Michonne's heart beat fast as Rick's passionate speech took hold and she let all the words sink in. God, it would be so easy to just love this man and enjoy him for as many days as they had left. They could grab their happiness as it came and to hell with the rest. She wanted nothing more than to kiss his fears away, stroke and caress him until all he knew was the touch and smell of her and all he could hear were their sighs.

But she couldn't. _Not yet_. She sat up straight and made sure her tone carried the confidence it needed to, even if she didn't quite feel it yet.

"You're right. That kiss was real. It was beautiful and it _has_ been building up. I won't deny that. But I'm not going to let our relationship, whatever it's turning into now, stop us from being who we are and stop us from doing what we have to do," She looked into Rick's eyes staring at her and she knew she had his full attention.

"You're a father, Rick, with a boy whose life has just been turned upside down. You're a new leader inheriting the position from a woman who _died_ yesterday. You're leading a community with breached walls. A community who just lost half of their people to evil and the dead. You're a man who has to figure out how to get through this. Because there is a lot of 'this' to get through," Michonne held his hand and ducked her head to meet his downturned eyes, "And me? I'm the woman who is going put aside her desires and wants _for now_ because I love Carl and I want him to get better. I'm the woman who will be by your side as you rebuild this town. I will cherish last night because it's going to get me through the days ahead while we figure this all out. And we will, Rick. We'll get through this and we'll help Carl get through this."

Rick knew Michonne was right but he hated her words. He hated the sense and the logic and the truth in them. When would it be their turn? When would they get to be happy? Would they be able to before it was their turn to die? But he knew Carl needed stability and calm while he recovered. Coming home to his dad in a new relationship with 'the lady with the sword' could upset him even more, especially as he was mourning his mom all over again. And, dammit, they did have a town to re-build. Defenses to shore up...

Rick smiled wryly and shook his head in defeat, "Why do you have to be so smart and selfless? Why can't you just think of yourself once in a damn while, huh?"

Michonne returned his smile with a soft one of her own, "Grabbing onto you and Carl and Judith isn't selfless, Rick. You and your family are the gifts I've given to myself and I'm not sure if I completely deserve you all, but _I don't care_. You're mine and I'm going to do everything in my power to make things right, understood?"

"Understood. So, what do we do now? How do we...act...with each other?"

Michonne prayed for strength because she'd need every ounce of it in the coming days, "We continue being friends and we work together to make this place right and to help Carl recover. And then..."

Rick stared intently at her, blue eyes setting her heart to race, "And then?" he rasped.

Michonne smiled and squeezed his hands. "And then we'll see. We'll see..."

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

A week later, Carl was home and Rick and Michonne had settled into a truce of sorts, for his sake. They buried their attraction for each other as best they could and spent their days alternating between staying at home with the kids and working on the town defenses. Since she thought it important for Rick to step into his leadership role quickly, Michonne insisted on being at home more. Due to their disparate schedules, they only saw each other at breakfast and dinner and, even then, missed meals together. In a way, it made things easier as temptation wasn't always there in front of them and they could pretend things were how they used to be.

After laying Judith down for her nap, Michonne walked out to the front porch for some fresh air and spotted Carl on the swing, slowly moving it with his one foot, his head tucked into his chest.

 _Carl._

The boy who came home from the infirmary was a stranger. Quiet, sullen, and cold, he barely spoke to anyone and was prone to angry outbursts when Rick pushed him to engage. He still had a bandage covering his eye as he refused the patch. Michonne believed that he just didn't want to admit that his injury was permanent and neither she nor Rick pushed him. The one time he smiled was when Judith reached for him which gave Michonne hope. If he could smile at his sister, there was a chance he could learn to smile for other reasons.

Michonne communicated with Carl like she did when she first met him almost a year ago. Very matter of fact and to the point. No hugs or signs of affection. But she was counting on building up to that someday. After watching Carl on the swing for another moment, she let her presence be known.

"Hey."

Carl continued to look at the ground, pushing the swing methodically, his greeting a mumble into his shirt. Michonne held back a sigh and made her way to the top step where she took a seat, facing Carl.

"I saw Dr. Cloyd this morning and she said your recovery is going well. Your dizziness has stopped and she said you're almost well enough for normal activity. Like going to school and ..."

"I'm not going to school. I'm never going to school."

"Oh really? How come?" Michonne didn't dare tell him he loved going to school before his injury. That would only end with him storming off.

Carl finally picked his head up so he could sneer at Michonne, "Why should I bother? So I can get good grades and go to college? Oh wait, there aren't any more colleges! I know! I can learn about _literature_! _That_ will help me next time a walker tries to eat me. Of course, I'll be dead because I won't be able to SEE the walker! So...yeah...whatever...I don't need school."

Michonne's heart broke. He was in so much pain and he was so lost. How did she reach him before? They shared confidences and they worked together. Maybe that would be the way this time.

"Carl, you've seen me exercise in the backyard with my sword and, before your injury, you saw me kill walkers with it. You might not remember, but you did."

Carl narrowed his eyes at Michonne as if trying to figure out her angle, "I have foggy memories of you and your sword. I remember you using it."

 _That's because you're fascinated by it. I'm a comic book come to life_ , Michonne wanted to tell him but kept quiet. She had to tread carefully. She'd noticed Carl looking out his bedroom window this past week as she performed her exercises. She purposely waited to do them until later in the morning when she knew Carl was awake. He had always loved watching her with her sword and she was counting on that love to still be there, even if he didn't want to admit to it.

"Good, you remember. Now, let me ask you a question because you and I have never talked about this and, trust me, we've had a lot of conversations this past year. What do you think I did as a job before all of this?"

Carl stared at her for a long moment and Michonne caught her breath at his good eye, so like his father's, searing into her as if he could read her every thought. She forced herself to sit still and nonchalant so she didn't scare him away.

"I don't know. CIA, maybe? Or Secret Service?" Carl's brow wrinkled as he rubbed his forehead, "I should know this, shouldn't I? I should know enough about you to figure it out," Carl's voice raised with his agitation and Michonne interjected before he got more upset.

"Nah, we never talked about what I did so you wouldn't know. What makes you say CIA?"

"You're so athletic and smart. You're smarter than my Dad and he's the smartest person I know," Michonne swallowed a snort as she tucked that observation in her pocked to brag about the next time she spoke with Rick. _Smarter than his dad indeed_. "I think more than anything, though, it's your confidence with your weapon. You look invincible with it. Like it's an old friend," Carl caught himself as he realized how flowery his statement was. He gave his head a quick shake and added a shrug, "I don't know why I think that. I just do. What's your point, anyway? Who cares what you did back then?"

"You think I was CIA and the truth is I couldn't have been farther from CIA if I tried. I was a college professor," Michonne paused to take in Carl's dropped jaw. "And what do you think I taught?"

"Medieval history."

"Nope."

"Criminal Justice."

"Try again."

"ROTC."

Michonne laughed. She was really getting an unexpected ego boost with this conversation. She gave her answer with a smug smile.

"Art History."

God, she wished she had a camera to capture the shock on his face at her admission. You would have thought she'd said librarian or nursery school teacher.

"No way, I don't believe you." Carl adamantly shook his head but Michonne was thrilled at his engagement in the conversation. He was looking at her, not the ground and he wasn't speaking in the monotone mumble he'd been using since coming home from the hospital. _Keep it going_. She nodded and smiled, adding a bragging tone to her story.

"Yup, I was a professor for the Art History Department for Emory University in Atlanta. I specialized in modern and contemporary art. And, I'll have you know, that I was a favorite among the students. I was quite popular."

Carl stopped swinging as he leaned forward, his brow furrowed as he tried to fit the puzzle pieces together, "But...were you a fencing instructor or something? How did you get so good with the sword? Where did you learn to fight and kill? I don't understand."

 _Now we get to it._ Michonne casually leaned against the stair rail as she smoothed out a non-existent wrinkle on her pants. "I had never picked up a sword in my entire life until two weeks after the world went to hell. I found it at the refugee camp I was in with Andre and Mike. The owner had died and I thought it would be a useful weapon to have so I took it."

"But...you're so good at it. It's like you've had it forever."

Michonne thought back on those horrible days that first year. After Andre and Mike, walking all alone. "Somedays it does seem like I've had it forever. That sword has saved me more times than I can count. I taught myself how to use it because I knew bullets ran out and knives let them in too close so I worked hard every day until I felt like I could control it. I did push-ups and arm hangs to build my arm strength and all the walking and running I did built up my conditioning to the point where I felt confident that I could survive out on the road. Just me and my sword. I did it because I had nothing else. I had no one else."

She had to make Carl understand that his life wasn't over. _She had to_ , "Carl, when I was in that refugee camp, I was a college professor with a 3 year old son and my idea of an adventure was to vacation in a cabin instead of a hotel. I knew colors and textures and artists and nothing about fighting and killing and building a fire from scratch. But I knew that if I didn't learn, my son would die and I would die.

I chose life. I chose to meet the monsters for as long as I could so that _I_ could be the one standing in the end. And when I lost Andre, it was hard but I kept fighting so I could remember my son and remember what living was for." Michonne's vision blurred with her tears at her memories but she could still see Carl staring at her, clearly impacted by her story. _Please Carl. Please hear me_.

Carl looked down at his hands for several long moments, his chest heaving with his rapid breaths. Finally, he responded in a whisper, "I don't think I can do it. I'm not strong like you. I'm just a kid and now I'm a kid missing an eye. I don't think I can be a fighter anymore."

Michonne quickly got up and sat next to Carl on the swing, reassuring him with her nearness but not touching, "Carl, I _know_ you can do it. I've seen you grow up this past year from a scared kid to a young man who fought back a herd to help a scared woman and child. I've seen you shoot and I've seen you with knives. You were strong and unafraid before your injury and I know you can get there again. You _are_ a fighter, Carl. You might not remember it but, trust me, I've seen it. I wouldn't be out here talking to you unless I knew you could do it. I would have you learning about solar panels with Eugene. Instead you're going to spend time with me," Michonne's breath caught as Carl turned to her with tears in his eye, a glimmer of hope shining through. _Yes, we can do this_. She gently laid her hand on top of his.

"You're going to learn how to fight again."

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Michonne couldn't sleep. She was too warm and too wired from her progress with Carl. As she lay in bed, she smiled as she replayed the conversation at dinner where she and Carl shared their plans with a stunned Rick. She would keep the vision of his grateful and relieved face tucked away for times when she needed reassurance she was doing the right thing with Carl. While they still had a long way to go with him, Carl was willing to try and that was a huge first step.

Looking at the clock, she saw it was after midnight and the quiet house confirmed all were asleep. Michonne threw back the covers and made her way downstairs to retrieve the book she was reading, hoping that would help her go to sleep. Spying it on the kitchen counter, she had just grabbed it and turned around when she found herself bumping into a warm, bare chest.

"Couldn't sleep?" Rick's raspy whisper echoed in the darkened room and the sound of it combined with her front row view of his chest made her knees weaken.

"Yeah, I thought I'd grab a book to try to help me relax." Breathe in, breathe out. Just another minute and you'll be back in your bed…..Michonne chased thoughts of her large bed out of her mind. Oh god…she was weak….

Rick was not an inch from her, his eyes blazing a trail from her face down the length of her body, barely covered in a thin tank top and shorts, and back up again. He didn't touch her but Michonne felt as if she were naked and being caressed nonetheless. Her heart was about to give out.

"I couldn't sleep either. You know why?"

Michonne swallowed and barely whispered her response, "No, why?"

Rick lifted his right hand and trailed one finger from her collarbone to her shoulder and down her arm in a slow, light stroke.

"I couldn't sleep because for the past 8 nights, all I can think about is kissing you for the length of a day and touching you all over for the length of another. And then when I'm done kissing you and touching you in my mind, I start all over again until I can't remember a day when you weren't mine. I've got a lot of plans for us, Michonne. I know we're waiting. I get it. But our time is coming," His beautiful blue eyes shone through the dim kitchen at her as gave a small smile, "Be ready for it." His finger stopped its leisurely trail down her arm at his last words and he whispered good night as he walked back upstairs.

Michonne dropped onto the stool at the counter and grabbed her arm that had just been lit on fire.

God help her. How was she supposed to go to sleep _now_?


	9. Soon

**I felt the need to write something uplifting and positive ahead of tonight's episode. I hope you enjoy it! Thank you so much for your patience as Rick and Michonne slowly find their way towards each other!**

The sun was hot on his head but he didn't care...the exercise filled his lungs with air and reminded him that he was alive and getting stronger every day. He whipped the stick around his head in the controlled motions Morgan had taught him, loving the repetition and the way it made his muscles ache.

"Okay, Carl, that's enough for today."

Michonne's voice carried across the yard from her spot on the back porch, where she was watching him while holding the baby. Carl scolded himself. _Judith._ Her name is Judith. You named her, now remember it. He hated the empty space in his mind where the last year should be. It made him angry and want to stay in his room but his dad and Michonne wouldn't let him. Every day for the past two weeks, he ate breakfast with them both, lunch with Michonne and most days dinner with the whole family. In between meals, he trained with Michonne and Morgan as much as his body would allow.

"Carl," Michonne's quiet greeting was much closer and he looked up from where he was staring at the stick to find her right in front of him, her arms empty. He looked over to the porch to see Morgan taking Judith inside. Resigning himself to what was coming next, he stood straight and looked Michonne in the eye.

Michonne stared back with that steady gaze that he had come to identify as hers. No pity, no tears. It wasn't a gaze meant to baby or coddle. It was a look a teacher gave a student when she meant to push them just a little bit more. And each day, Michonne pushed him but never enough to hurt him. He trusted her not to ever hurt him. He broke her gaze to gently lay the stick on the ground and then he lowered himself into a sitting position as Michonne did. This was the part of his daily routine he dreaded the most. The part that reminded him that he was different, that he wasn't whole anymore.

Carl mimicked Michonne's cross legged position and loosely draped his hands over his knees. Looking at her, he let his mind empty of worrying thoughts.

"Deep breath in and hold it. That's good. Now slowly let it go. Let it all go," Michonne's soft low tone was a balm and it helped him focus on the task ahead. He went through three more breaths and then, like Michonne, he closed his eye so the world was dark. He continued relaxed breathing as he allowed his other senses to take control. He sat on that grass for a lifetime with no thoughts but his surroundings and his awareness that Michonne was inches away, there if he needed her.

Just as he started to feel his foot fall asleep, they started.

"What do you feel?"

"I feel the grass beneath me. It's soft and it's a cushion. It feels good."

What else do you feel?"

"I feel my muscles aching. It feels good. I feel strong."

Carl could sense Michonne's small smile even though his eye remained closed. He liked the thought of making her smile.

"What do you smell?"

"I smell the grass. I smell the roses. I smell my sweat."

Another pause from Michonne as Carl imagined her approval of his rapid fire certain response.

"What do you hear?"

Carl took another deep breath and emptied his mind of everything, all of the pain, the anger, the grief.

"I hear my breathing. I hear your breathing. My breathing is slow. Yours is faster. I hear Judith in the kitchen laughing. I hear Morgan speaking to her," Another breath. "I hear hammering and shouting to my right, down the street, at the walls. I hear Mike's dog barking to my left."

Carl went silent as he allowed his breathing to take over and block out everything but sound. A few minutes later, "I hear walkers outside the gate. At least three of them. Maybe more," A minute later..."They've stopped. Sasha got them." Pleased with himself, Carl opened his eye to find Michonne looking at him as if he'd fought a herd by himself. His heart ached at her pride as he didn't know how to react. He watched her catch herself and become composed again.

"You did great, Carl. I didn't hear them. _You did_. Let's go." She pulled him up with her hand and they jogged down the street to the wall, Carl's heart racing with excitement. He followed Michonne up to the platform at the top of the wall just in time to see Tobin and two other men clear the four newly put down walkers from the gate.

Without thinking, Michonne pulled Carl into a hug, her joy blocking her awareness of how stiffly he held himself in her arms. She cupped his head and drew him close, "I'm so proud of you." After a moment, Michonne realized that Carl was not returning her embrace and she was mortified at her misstep. She quickly stepped back to give him the space he needed, praying that she didn't undo two weeks of hard work. "I'm sorry, Carl. I didn't mean to..."

"Yes you did. You meant to hug me," Carl stood straight, his hands at his sides and looked at her without hesitation, "It's okay. You didn't change. I did." Carl watched the conflict play over Michonne's face and he knew the mother in her wanted to hug him again and, for a moment, he felt bad for her. His mouth curved slightly at the thought. Hey, maybe he wasn't too far gone after all if he could feel bad for someone else. Maybe, there was hope he could be normal some day.

Michonne took a breath to settle her emotions as she looked at Carl, heart bursting with pride and yet breaking for the boy Carl now was. Keep it together for him. _Be who he needs you to be_. She kept her voice light and matter of fact.

"Yes, you changed and I forgot that in my excitement. But you know what? You need to allow me my moment because I am so damn proud of you. You're a fighter like your dad, you know? You're a fighter and you work so hard every day all day to get strong. I can't tell you how happy that makes me," Michonne ducked her head to look Carl in the eye, "Do you know why that makes me happy?"

Carl shook his head, eyebrows lowered in confusion at her emotions.

"It makes me happy because every day you get stronger is a day you win this thing. Every day you learn to do things you never knew before and every day you hear things others can't hear is a day you become _more_ than you were. And, that my friend, is what is going to keep you here. That is what is going to make you live a long life. And that's all I ever wanted for you. That's all your dad ever wanted for you," Michonne grasped Carl's arm lightly, "You're going to beat this Carl. You may not see it yet but I do and I'll see it for the both of us until you're ready."

Carl's heart raced as dormant emotions rose to the surface. No he wasn't ready yet and he couldn't see what Michonne saw but one thing he knew for sure. He was loved. He wasn't a monster because he was loved and that was enough for now.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

The next evening, Rick entered the kitchen after his shower to find Michonne sitting down at the dinner table set for two. Looking around, he was pleasantly surprised to find them alone, a rarity these days. He worked long days trying to get the town in order and every spare moment he had was spent with his kids. Michonne was around but would often make herself scarce in order to give him time alone with Judith and with Carl, time that was precious in its scarceness. They shared meals together and saw each other outside of the house at town meetings and performing tasks but nothing like a dinner for two.

As he approached the table, Michonne looked up and smiled, "I was so hungry, I was getting ready to start without you."

Rick sat down kitty corner from her so their knees would touch and moved his place setting from the other end of the table where it was originally set. If he was going to have a private meal, he damn well was going to enjoy every second of it. He smiled at the look of surprise on her face at his move. When will she realize he needed to be close to her like he needed to breathe? The only reason he was able to stay away during the day was he knew that he was getting this town in order and becoming the leader it needed and she was helping his son heal. Things they agreed needed to be done before they could be together.

He moved his chair so that his knee rested against hers, loving the rapid breathing he induced, "To what do I owe this pleasure?"

Michonne swallowed and willed herself not to stammer, "Judy didn't nap today so she went down early and Carl begged to eat in his room. I put him through the paces today so I took pity on him and allowed him his freedom for tonight. He deserved it."

Rick nodded, "Carl stopped by the wall build this afternoon and told me that he started to work with the dummies today. You had him work with different knives, including the machete. He was as excited as I've seen him since...everything."

Michonne relaxed into her chair, "He's doing so well, better than I could ever have expected. He's like a sponge and wants to learn every weapon and wants to be the best at it. It's getting to the point where I could picture a day very soon where I run out of things to teach him. I have to remind myself not to work him too much as he's still recovering but his determination makes it hard."

Rick smiled at Michonne's beaming face. When she first came into their lives, he and Carl were in a world of hurt and she helped them find their way. And here she was, doing it all over again. He didn't know what he did to deserve her but he knew damn well he wasn't letting her go. Smiling back at her, he tilted his head, "I can't believe how far he's come in such a short time. It's all due to you. You got through to him and lit a fire under him. I can't thank you enough for that."

"Don't thank me Rick. This isn't a task or a job I'm doing. I need to help Carl get stronger so I can rest at night knowing he can take care of himself. I'm where I want to be doing what I want to be doing, understood?"

"Understood."

They ate in companionable silence but the air thrummed with awareness as they kept their desires at bay. Rick missed being near Michonne and vowed to no longer let more than a few hours go by without seeing her. He now knew why he never let the road travel do him in. It was because Michonne was never more than a few feet from his side and as long as she was there, he felt stronger and smarter and he needed to get that feeling back again. He needed to be with her.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Two days later, Rick entered his yard and watched Carl stick fighting with Morgan. He was grateful for the time Morgan took each day with Carl in order to teach him the new skill. While Carl might not have the strength yet to kill walkers just with a stick, the orchestrated, repetitive movements built up his muscles as well as his confidence and Rick could see the positive impact as Carl walked through town with his head held high, no longer hiding in his room when he wasn't training.

When Morgan finished with Carl, he spotted Rick and greeted him on his way into the house. "Your boy is a hard worker Rick. He's doing well." With a pat on the shoulder, Morgan left Rick alone with his son.

Rick smiled with pride. Carl was a fighter. He might not ever regain this past year but he would fight to be strong and to survive. Of that Rick was positive. As he walked up to Carl, he noticed how he adjusted the bandage on his eye. In the beginning, Carl refused to wear anything but a bandage because he wouldn't accept a permanent solution and no one pushed it with him. Well, he'd come a long way since those dark days.

With a small smile, Rick reached into his pocket and pulled out the patch he had made. Carl took it and examined it carefully with his fingers, his eyebrows low in concentration. When Carl looked at Rick in question, he explained.

"There was a state trooper's hat in the clothing pantry. Fortunately, it was the same color as your old hat. _The same exact color_. So I asked Mrs. Paulsen to make your patch out of it. She made several actually." Rick watched as Carl's eye widened in surprise and then disappear as he quickly bowed his head toward the patch in his hand. Rick continued

"Carl, I told you this once during the year that you've lost so I'll say it again. You're a man. I see that plain as day. You're not a boy I need to hide or lock away inside. You're a man and you're a fighter. This world took your eye and it took some of your memories and you're going to wrestle with that for awhile. But this world cannot and will not take from you your strength and your spirit. I've seen it these past days while you've been training. You're coming back and you're going to be a part of this community. You're going to help protect it and you're going to help it grow. You might not believe it yet but I do and I'm going to keep telling you that until it's the only truth you see."

Carl was quiet for a long time as he looked down at his hands holding the patch. Rick looked away as Carl quickly brushed the moisture off his cheek from the few tears he allowed to trickle out. Finally, Carl took a deep breath and stood tall, looking Rick in the eye.

"Will you help me put it on?"

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

As Michonne made her way down the stairs, she reflected on the day. It had been a good one. Carl had walked over to where she was working on walker traps with Glenn and Maggie in order to show off his patch. While he wasn't the gregarious teen anymore, the glimmer of excitement in his eye warmed her as much as cheering would have. She was also touched that he took the time to show it to her. She kept her cool and calmly informed him that it looked quite nice and made sure that it felt comfortable. Carl then surprised her again by asking if he could help with the walker traps. Glenn and Maggie lowered their faces to hide their smiles as Michonne welcomed him onto their crew.

Michonne walked into the kitchen to the sight of Rick massaging his neck and twisted his shoulders and back as if he were in pain. He then dropped his head towards the coffee cup at the breakfast counter. He put in 12 hour days and a lot of those hours were physical labor. He refused to ask people to perform tasks he wasn't willing to perform himself and, as a result, he was overdoing it. He looked like he was in pain or uncomfortable and Michonne wanted to help him.

Actually if she were honest, she wanted to get her hands on him.

The kids were sleeping. What would be the harm with a shoulder massage between friends? Michonne walked on silent feet until she was inches away from Rick's broad back and shoulders, muscles bunching through the tight material. _I love his shoulders_. He must have been a million miles away in his thoughts to not hear her approach. She smiled as she gently placed her hands on his muscled shoulders and began to gently knead. Rick sat up straight and started to turn around at her touch but she stopped with a hush as she continued her massage. At first he was tense due to his surprise but after a moment, he allowed himself to relax and Michonne applied herself to making him feel better. She remembered doing this for Mike at the end of a long workday and loved the groans of pleasure she would elicit from him. Rick was different. The more her fingers worked his shoulders and neck and back, the quieter he got. She had no idea if she was helping or making it worse.

"Does this feel good?"

"Yes." His answer was a raspy growl that startled her with its intensity. He didn't sound very relaxed. She gentled her touch but found the temptation too strong and her fingers were soon sliding up and down his back in a caress rather than a massage. She loved Rick's body. She loved the strength, the lean muscles, the capability behind them. She loved his arms and hands and...Michonne was startled out of her musings as Rick suddenly spun around on the stool and placed his hands on her hips, pulling her in between his knees. His position on the stool put his eyes at her throat level and she swallowed hard at the blazing heat emanating out of them. He definitely wasn't relaxed.

"You have no idea what your touch does to me do you?" Rick's question was a whispered breath against her neck as he inched her even closer. Michonne shook her head.

Rick reared his head up from her neck so that he could look her straight in the eye. If he hadn't grasped her hips, Michonne was sure she'd crumble in a heap on the floor at the blatant lust in his eyes. The darkened kitchen was silent except for their rapid breathing. Michonne refused to break Rick's stare but the longer they went on, the weaker her knees felt. She held back a groan as Rick's fingers flexed on her hips and he pulled her in even closer.

"Michonne?" Her name was a low rasp that sent tingles throughout her body.

"Yes, Rick?" Her composed response was an act and Rick's raised eyebrow told her he saw right through her.

"Carl is almost healed."

"Yes he is."

"The walls are rebuilt"

"Yes they are."

"I'm the leader now."

 _Oh God...this man..._

Rick's hands squeezed her hips and then ran them up her sides, bunching her shirt up around her middle. Michonne closed her eyes as heat coursed through her entire body. If he didn't stop, she wouldn't be responsible for what she did next.

"Michonne, look at me."

She opened her eyes to find his roaming her face until she felt like she couldn't look at him anymore. It was too much. He pulled her in even closer until they were almost one.

"You're everything to me." Rick's whispered drawl into her ear made her heart feel full to bursting. This warrior, this leader, father, friend, cared about her. And that meant the world to her.

"I want you."

Michonne's knees did give out but it didn't matter because Rick's arms had wrapped around her body in an embrace that made them one. He stood up from the stool and dipped his head as his lips claimed hers in a kiss that set her whole body on fire. His tongue found hers as he pulled her in even closer, his hands pushing her shirt high so that his hands could caress her bare skin. It was a battle of a different kind between them as their lips moved over the other's and their tongues darted in and out of their mouths in a dance as old as time. Michonne wrapped her arms around Rick's neck and stood on her toes so that her whole body aligned with his. She tugged on his curls and made him groan.

Rick didn't know how long they kissed in that kitchen but he would have killed anyone or anything that tried to stop him from touching and loving this woman. Her supple mouth moved against his with a passion and ferocity that matched his own and he had to wonder what had taken him so long to find his way to her. He pulled her even closer as he tilted his head and drove his tongue deeper into her mouth, his heart racing at the moans emanating from her. She may be too good for him. She may deserve someone more stable but she was his and nothing and no one was going to stop him from making her his in fact.

Rick was reaching the point of no return and would soon simply pick Michonne up and take her on the kitchen counter. But he wouldn't. He couldn't.

Because she _was_ too good for him and she _did_ deserve better. She deserved more than their first time to be a quickie in the kitchen. She deserved thought and caring and...more.

And he was going to give it all to her.

Pulling away, Rick looked into Michonne's beautiful brown eyes and almost lost his will to wait but knew that now would be for him and this needed to be all about her. He cupped her face and willed his breathing to even out as he rained tiny kisses over her face, ending with a delicate brush on her lips. He smiled as he watched her come down to earth, her brow wrinkling adorably as her breathing slowed down to normal levels.

"Why did you stop?"

"I'm not having our first time be on the kitchen counter. You deserve more than that."

Michonne took a deep breath and stepped away, only to yelp as Rick grabbed her back. "I thought you wanted to wait!"

Rick held her close with not even a breath between them as he lowered his forehead to hers, "I need to make this very clear to you. We are going to make love. We are going to be together in every single sense of the word very, very soon. You put parameters in place and I'm honoring them. But, it's happening and the old fashioned country boy in me wants to do right by you. You okay with that?"

Lawd...If Michonne had a fan, she'd whip it out and put it to use because this man...she just didn't know how to deal with him sometimes.

"Yes, Rick, I'm okay with that."

Rick nodded, kissed her one more time and stepped away, "Excellent. Now get yourself upstairs before I decide to listen to my body instead of my head."

Michonne grinned and backed away to the stairs, putting a little sway in her stride, "You go ahead and figure things out, Rick Grimes. I'll try to be here when you do." She laughed at his groan and ran up the stairs, feeling lighter than she had in forever.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

A few days later, there was an impromptu party in the park in the middle of town to celebrate the wall rebuilds as well as all of the other fortifications. They were as safe as they could possibly be due to everyone's hard work. Two of the residents played guitar and sang as the residents and Rick's group mingled together, chatting and laughing and dancing, finally relaxing after the horror of a month ago.

Rick leaned against a tree, watching Michonne laugh with Maggie and Rosita over by the refreshments. She looked beautiful in a loose long skirt and a midriff baring camisole top that showed her beautiful skin to perfection. He couldn't take his eyes off of her. He was shaken out of his reverie by Carl's approach across the grassy field. Rick stood up straight at his approach.

"Dad?"

"Yeah, son."

"I want to talk to you about something."

Rick put a hand on Carl's shoulder as he looked very serious, "What's up?"

Carl looked at the ground, shifting nervously "I might not remember Michonne from...before. But, I've gotten to know her these last few weeks and...I like her, Dad. She's smart and strong and she's awesome fighting walkers and she makes Judith laugh," Carl looked up at Rick, "She makes you laugh too."

Rick swallowed his emotion at Carl's speech and nodded, "She does."

Carl nodded, "I think she might be one of us."

Oh God...Rick's eyes welled up before he could stop it and all he could do was nod and smile through his emotions. Their world had almost destroyed his son but in the end, love won out. Friendship and family won out. And they got a second chance to do this right. Again.

"Yeah, I think so too."

Carl continued to look Rick in the eye, knowledge making his mouth curve into that almost smile he used now. "You know what else I think? Actually, what I know?"

"No, what?"

"You like her Dad and she likes you. A lot. I see it. And I wanted to let you know that that's fine with me."

Rick drew Carl in for a hug, his heart full and was grateful to feel Carl hug him back, just a little. But it was a start.

An hour later, Rick watched Michonne sway to the music, a soft smile curving her full lips.

This woman deserved to be loved. To be cherished. For as many days as he had left on this earth, he'd be the one to do it.

Rick smiled and thought of one last plan to put into place. _Tonight_.


	10. Together

**Finally! Rick and Michonne's friendship makes the leap to love in this final chapter. I hope you enjoy reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it!**

Michonne took another sip of her wine as she listened to Rosita talk to Julia, one of the Alexandria residents. It was wonderful that they all had this chance to catch their breath and relax after everything they'd been through. Her eyes surveyed the park, scanning the partygoers until she found Carl sitting alone on a bench staring at the drink cup in his hand. She had just made a step to go towards him when she saw Enid, a girl Carl's age, sit down next to him and start talking to him. Michonne watched carefully as she observed Carl withdraw a bit and even scoot away from Enid on the bench in an instinctual move she'd seen him make time and time again since losing his eye and his memory. He was so wary around people now, so different from how he was before. She reminded herself that each day was a win because Carl built new memories and new experiences to replace the ones he'd lost so brutally. They just had to keep giving him those days until he was whole again. She smiled to herself as she watched Carl turn toward Enid to respond to her chatter and allow a small smile appear on his typically sullen face.

One day at a time. That was the plan.

"Michonne? Rick asked me to give you this."

Michonne turned as Maggie's hand gently tapped her arm. She took a folded piece of paper from her and looked questioningly at her friend. Maggie shrugged with a smile and a sparkle in her green eyes, "Hey, I'm just the messenger." Michonne was startled as Maggie gave her a quick hug. Before Michonne could respond, Maggie had already turned and walked away with a wave over her shoulder.

Curious, Michonne opened the paper and read Rick's familiar scrawl:

 _Meet me at 78 Sugarcreek Lane. Don't worry about the kids. They're taken care of. - Rick_

What was he up to? Heart beating a bit faster, Michonne glanced over towards Carl one last time to see him still engaged with Enid, Glenn and Maggie nearby with Maggie bouncing Judith on her hip. Well then, far be it from me to keep the boss waiting, Michonne joked with herself as she put her glass down on a nearby table and headed down the street toward the address on the card. Sugarcreek was a part of town that was still uninhabited and a good ten minute walk so her curiosity was definitely peeked as she approached the street. The sun was low in the sky and lit the trees and houses with a soft glow to go along with the party music fading in the background and the sound of crickets chirping all around her. The house Rick directed her to was at the end of the street and was a tidy white ranch home with a neatly trimmed lawn. Curiosity more than peeked at the neat lawn, Michonne quickened her pace, anticipation getting the best of her.

As she approached the front door, it opened and Rick appeared in the doorway, his gaze warm as surveyed her in the dwindling sunlight. His casual lean against the doorway belied the intensity in his eyes and Michonne felt her already rapid heartbeat speed up even more.

"Hey." Rick's greeting may have been simple but his tone along with his small smile was that of a man with a secret.

"Hey back. What are you up to? Why the cloak and dagger stuff?"

Rick's smile turned into a grin at her questions and he straightened up and pulled the door wide to let her in. "Come on in and see for yourself."

Michonne walked into the house and surveyed the rooms as she heard the front door shut and lock with a soft click behind her. From her position in the open foyer, she took in the pristine living room with its gleaming hardwood floors and white walls that looked freshly painted. The large sofa with its oversized colorful pillows took up half the room along with a huge chair and ottoman built for two. Michonne took a few more steps into the room and caught her breath at the two paintings on the main wall. They were a matching set of Kandinsky reproductions and their colorful, abstract lines made her heart feel full with memories of her life before. Without thinking, she walked up to the paintings and lifted her hands to trace the beautiful swirls, her throat clogging with emotion.

"Do you like them?" Rick's gruff whisper came right over her shoulder. Not trusting herself to speak, Michonne nodded and then walked into the kitchen. She took in the gleaming countertops and stainless steel tea kettle on the stove along with a rack stocked with tea. She guessed they were her favorite flavors. The rooms had a lingering smell of fresh paint along with the pleasant aroma of being recently cleaned and aired out.

Rick watched with bated breath as Michonne took in the fruits of his labors these past few weeks. He wanted everything to be perfect for her. Everything. He tried to think of every detail and hoped he didn't misstep with any of it. Watching her run her hands along the paintings and now on the countertops made his heart race as he imagined those beautiful long fingers touching him. God, he wanted her with a force he'd never felt before. Actually, now that his eyes had been opened to this amazing woman, he couldn't imagine a moment _not_ wanting her. He loved everything about her. Her beauty, yes, but also her strength, her intelligence, her generous, giving spirit and even her ability to call him on his bullshit.

When Rick had finished his plans and knew the time had come to bring them all to life, he felt moments of trepidation and fear. He had only been with one other woman his whole life and he had met Lori when they were just kids. The only experience he had with intimacy was with his wife. Michonne was so much more sophisticated than he was. He knew she was better than him in so many ways. What if he failed to excite her or give her pleasure? What if he disappointed her? Watching her walk towards him on that walkway tonight allayed every fear he had and he felt his confidence grow with each step she made. This beautiful woman was his best friend. This strong, smart woman was his partner and his family.

All he had to do was love her. And he knew how to do that.

Michonne turned from her survey of the house and looked up at Rick who was standing right behind her. Her breath stopped at the warmth in his gaze and she put her hand to her heart in wonder.

"You did all this for _me_?" Her words barely whispered past the tears in her throat. She was overwhelmed. The fresh, clean house, the tea, the art, the furniture. It was all to her taste. Down to the sheer curtains billowing in the breeze. Rick had thought of everything and it humbled her. How did he do all this while rebuilding a town and helping his son recover? Her face must have given her away because Rick chuckled as he shoved his hands into his jeans pockets and surveyed the house with her.

"I did it all for you. And, yes, I had lots of help, trust me."

"Who helped you? I don't understand...I..." Rick smiled and shook his head at her confusion and led her to the sofa in the living room where they both sat. Continuing to hold her hand, he explained.

"I decided weeks ago when you gave me your..uh...conditions for our relationship that I would use that time to do this for you. It was important to me. This was going to be a first for both of us and I wanted it to be perfect. And by perfect I meant perfect for you because my needs are simple. To make you happy." As Michonne opened her mouth to most likely protest his efforts, Rick laid a finger gently on her lips, holding back from caressing them fully like he wanted to. There was a time for everything. When she had settled again, he lowered his hand to hers once more.

"I wanted a house that hadn't been occupied before so I spoke with Aaron and he showed me this place. It was in pretty good shape and just needed some touching up and cleaning. A few of the ladies were more than happy to help as it got them out of the heat and labor of building walker traps so it was a win for everyone. I asked Aaron if there was any modern art in any of the empty homes and he told me about those paintings that had been in storage and that no one had claimed yet. And before you get nervous, I just told everyone that I needed a house separate from the one I shared with my family in order to do my work and to hold meetings. No one questioned me."

Michonne stared at her hands intertwined with Rick's, his words washing over her and warming her from the inside out. All those months of being alone and living just for the memory of her son. Those terrible months of walking among the dead and just surviving had led her to this beautiful man who had needed her and befriended her and who was now laying rose petals at her feet in the guise of white walls and beautiful paintings.

Michonne looked up and into Rick's eyes, blinking tears from her own to see him more clearly. This handsome, wounded warrior had done so much for her and she didn't know if there were enough days left on earth to repay him. "I don't know what I did to deserve you, Rick. I truly don't. But I thank you. For everything. Thank you."

Rick shook his head, his thumb caressing her hand clasped in his. He ducked his head to meet her eyes head on, mere inches from his. His gruff whisper filled the quiet room.

"When we met, I was in a bad place. A real bad place. I had to get through that and it took me a long time. Meeting you, being your friend, that was _everything_. I'd never known anyone like you before. Not even close. Then when I got to know you, fight beside you, experience loss beside you, I knew that you were the person I was supposed to meet. You weren't just a woman with a sword. You were the woman who was gonna help me _beat this thing_. You were the woman who was gonna drag me out of the dark just by being you. And you did. I'm out here now with you and this is exactly where I want to be. Tonight. Tomorrow and all the days after that that you and I have left. Me and you. As long as that's the truth of it, we'll figure the rest out. Whatever this world throws at us, we'll figure it out."

Rick took a deep breath, emotion getting the best of him but he had to say the rest.

"I want to be a better man, a better father and leader so _you_ can have the best. I want to be there for you, love you, be your friend, your lover, _everything_.

You deserve it all Michonne. Every last bit of it."

Michonne knew she looked a mess with tears streaming down her face and she didn't care. This beautiful, strong, fierce man had just humbled himself before her and there was only one way to respond. She closed the distance between them, cupped his face between her hands and kissed him with everything she had in her heart. Rick wrapped his arms tightly around her and returned her kiss with a groan, his lips moving fervently with hers. Michonne pulled back slightly, her breaths coming fast in tandem with Rick's. As her eyes gazed into his, she whispered, "I love you Rick. I love your strength. I love your courage. I love that you choose life and the future and you're willing to fight for everything you have."

One more gentle kiss and then Michonne leaned back and clasped Rick's hands in hers as she continued, "I love that you want to be a better man but I need to make one thing very clear...Love doesn't come with conditions. You love who you love, okay? You're my best friend and you're my family. You think I deserve the best? Well guess what, I've found him. And _I'm not letting you go_."

Rick stared at Michonne for a moment as he wanted to commit her beauty to memory. He didn't want to forget any part of this night. With a small smile, he ran his hand down her arm and his smile grew as he felt her shiver. He loved that he effected her so strongly. He knew they were going to be good together. Their bodies were as in tune with each other as their minds and hearts were. He clasped her hand lightly and led her to the master bedroom down the short hall. After almost two years of celibacy and feeling like a hormonal teenage boy this past month, he wasn't sure how long he'd last but he was going to try like hell to give her the attention and loving she deserved.

The bedroom was clean and beautifully lit with two lanterns on either nightstand and the white bedspread gleamed in the twilight. Michonne could feel Rick behind her and she shivered in anticipation. After all of these weeks of waiting for the right moment, the moment was here. It was _now_. Stopping near the bed, Michonne turned to face Rick who was an inch behind her. Looking into his heated blue eyes, she smiled and slowly ran her hands up his muscled chest then over his shoulders to loop behind his neck. Standing on her toes, she whispered into his ear, "Make love to me, Rick Grimes."

Rick placed slightly trembling hands on Michonne's hips and drew her in close, her whispered plea sending a jolt throughout his body and made him even harder than he was when he first walked into the room. He looked into her beautiful eyes as he slowly drew his hands up her sides, pulling her camisole up with the motion. He continued to look into her eyes as he drew her top completely off and as she stood back to start unbuttoning his shirt. While their hands unclothed each other slowly, their eyes made promises that caused them both to start breathing heavier and faster. When Michonne was standing before him in her skimpy underwear and he was bare-chested with his jeans unbuttoned, Rick couldn't stand it anymore. He cupped Michonne's face and kissed her with all of the heat and wonder and love he had in him. Her lips met his with equal force and their lips parted as their tongues twined in a mating dance as old as time.

Michonne cupped the back of Rick's neck and drew him onto the bed with her, her eyes never leaving his. She loved that the room was lit so she could watch his beautiful face above hers every moment. She wanted to see what he felt when they came together. She wanted to capture every emotion, everything so could tuck these moments away for herself. As Rick rose above her on his elbows, her hands unzipped his fly and she shoved his jeans and boxers down in one smooth motion. Rick gave her the sexiest grin she'd ever seen in her life as thanks and she thought she'd come apart right then and there. _God, she wanted this man_.

How the hell was he supposed to make this last when he was hard as a rock at the sight of this gorgeous woman splayed out underneath him like an offering? It had been too long for him and these past weeks had been a build up to the point where he was about to burst. Rick looked down at her full breasts barely covered by her bra and then down further at her flat stomach and the curve of her hips. _Mine. She is mine._ Kissing her parted lips with his, he kneaded her breast and rolled her hardened nipple between his fingers. Michonne moaned softly and her legs fell open on either side of his as her hands stroked his ass. Working purely on instinct, his body took control and Rick kicked off his jeans and unclasped Michonne's bra in quick fervent movements. Her panties came off next and they were finally touching unfettered, unencumbered.

 _Oh God_...everything felt so good, so right. His callused fingers left a trail of fire down every inch of her skin he stroked and his lean body covering hers made her feel protected and cherished. Michonne never felt as consumed with need for another person as she did right now. She wanted Rick inside her, his thick cock filling her until nothing separated them, no space, nothing. Breaking away from their kiss, she looked into his blazing eyes and listened to his rapid breaths. "I need you. _Please_." At her words, Rick bit his lip slightly, lowered his forehead to hers and whispered, "I love you Michonne," as his cock entered her wet heat in one hard thrust. Michonne threw her head back in pleasure as he filled her and then whimpered as he slowly withdrew almost completely before thrusting forward again in a delicious rhythm that made her see stars.

Rick wanted to scream to the heavens that this woman was his. He never thought he was a possessive man but looking down at Michonne's beautiful face and her throat as she arched in pleasure, he knew he was staking claim to her. He smiled at the thought, knowing Michonne was staking her claim as well. They were one in flesh now just as their hearts had been joined in love and their minds had been joined in friendship. Now that he had her, he was never letting her go.

Michonne drew her legs up over Rick's hips to push him in even deeper and as her back arched with the movement, she moaned as he took a nipple in mouth and laved it lovingly. Michonne opened her eyes and met his looking at her over her breast. She should have been embarrassed that he was watching her but instead she felt empowered. She felt beautiful, loved, sexy, _everything_. She gave him a small smile and bit her lip slightly and was elated to watch his eyes heat even more at the sight. He growled and buried his face in her neck as his thrusts came faster and harder. Michonne matched his movements with her own and clenched around his cock, feeling it get even harder inside her. She was so close. _So, so close_. Her hands stroked his curls, reveling in their dampness. She arched her neck and her eyes flew open as she felt Rick's teeth lightly graze the tender spot where her shoulder met her neck. With Rick's next deep thrust, Michonne came apart with a cry as her legs tightened around his hips. Through her lowered lids she barely made out his face above hers as he watched her come. She held nothing back and let him see it all, every sensation, everything.

Michonne was beautiful as she came, her dark skin glistening in the lamplight, her full lips parted with her cries. _God, he loved this woman_. Rick felt her heat pulse around him and on the next thrust, he found his own release, remembering just in time to withdraw and spend on her stomach. His breathing was still rapid as he looked down at Michonne and took in her sated expression. He wished he was an artist so he could capture her slightly closed eyes and parted lips. He would simply have to rely on his memory. Rolling off of her, he laid on his side and propped his head up with his hand. With his free hand, he gently drew a finger down her arm and caressed her long slender fingers. Her hands were so beautiful, capable of such strength but delicate at the same time.

"Rick."

Rick looked up from his study of her hand to find her observing him with a smile. Oh and what a smile it was. He knew a satisfied woman when he saw her and that smile made him want to kiss her all over to keep it there. He smiled back and traced her lips with his fingers, "You okay?"

Michonne felt her smile turn into a grin at Rick's dear face. God, he was unreal. Such a gentleman, even after what they just did. He was a keeper, that's for sure. "Yeah, I'm okay. I'm um...more than okay actually." Rick's grin answered hers and they sat there smiling like idiots for another minute or two before Rick realized he'd forgotten one last detail. With a muttered expletive he bounded off the bed and grabbed a hand towel from the bathroom. Walking quickly back to the bed, he reclined next to Michonne again and started to clean her stomach off. Michonne stayed his hand, "Rick you don't need to..."

"Yes I do. Let me take care of you."

Michonne relaxed and watched as Rick gently cleaned her off, turning his ministrations into caresses that got her going all over again. "Rick..." His name came out on a wispy pant, "I think you can stop now..." Oh lord help her, she was getting wet again...

Rick tossed the towel to the floor and ran his hand up her belly to her breasts and then down to where was wet for him. With a cocky grin, he murmured into her ear, "Oh sweetheart, I'm not even close to stopping..."

And with those words, Rick showed Michonne just what a man coming off of two years of celibacy could pull off in one night.

Rick came out of the shower the next morning to find Michonne standing by the large bedroom window, clad only in his button down shirt, her beautiful long legs on display for his viewing pleasure. He admired them for a long minute before traveling up to take in her beauty as the sunrise beamed into their room. She was a woman thoroughly and completely loved and he didn't think it was his imagination but she appeared softer, more vulnerable and he loved her even more for it. She had given herself over to him completely last night and he would treasure it always.

Michonne felt Rick's presence behind her the moment before his arms wrapped around her waist and he rested his chin on her shoulder. She felt completely enveloped and safe, something she would have considered impossible even just a couple of months ago. Loving Rick had opened her eyes to all the possibilities this world still had to offer. She leaned back against him and laid her hands on his as they watched the sun rise together.

While there was still horror and death in their world and they didn't know what tomorrow would bring to their door, Michonne knew they would fight it together with everything they had in them because they had so much to fight for.

They would fight for their love. Their friendship. Their children. Their community. They would fight for a safe haven in a world gone to hell. They would fight for moments of laughter and lightness. For beauty that still remained in the world. They would fight for the chance for Carl to grow up and love someone of his own. For Judith to grow and learn how to navigate this world as a child of the apocalypse.

They would fight for each other because they were two halves of a heart and together they would conquer this world through their love.

Rick gave Michonne a hug, his heart full and his mind racing with all the possibilities loving this woman brought. He wanted to start making plans and building dreams and living and breathing and just being happy. As he watched the sun rise higher into the sky with the woman he loved in his arms, he whispered.

"You ready?" and let his smile stretch across his face at her response.

"Bring it."

 **While this may be the end of 'Something Else' I just can't say goodbye to these characters. Please look for a series of one shots in 'Something More' that will continue Rick and Michonne's story as we peak into their life as a couple in the apocalypse. There will also be a continuation of Carl's story as he learns how to live with the loss of his eye and memories.**


End file.
